I once believed that children who misbehaved, acted rudely, or engaged in odd behaviors were clearly victims of poor parenting. I used to think, “If only those parents knew better!” Oh, how I wish I could go back and give my past self a good talking-to! Now, I understand that those children were simply being kids, and their parents were likely just as bewildered by their antics as I was.
- Tantrums: It’s laughable to think I believed parents could prevent a toddler from throwing a tantrum once it started. Stopping a meltdown is like trying to halt a runaway train. You can attempt to soothe the child with calm words, but when the storm hits, all you can do is brace yourself for the chaos.
- Whining: I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve told my kids, “I can’t understand you when you whine.” Kids whine not because it works, but because they enjoy the sound of their own voices. And let’s not forget that beloved character, Caillou, who has surely influenced this behavior!
- Ignoring Others: Two of my children have mastered the art of selectively ignoring those who speak to them, despite numerous discussions about how it’s rude to do so. One child hears responses in her mind but doesn’t vocalize them, while the other just prefers to stay quiet unless he has something to say. Shyness can be quite the puzzle.
- Sleep Resistance: Some nights, my youngest can lie in bed for what feels like eternity—two and a half hours, to be exact—without falling asleep. He’ll sing, chat to himself, and even announce he’s still awake. No amount of running around during the day or a soothing bedtime routine seems to help; he’s simply a night owl.
- Volume Control: Some children seem to be born without the ability to modulate their volume. Their voices can fill a room, even when they’re just whispering. The only solution? Muzzling them—if only that were an option!
- Telling Little Lies: One of my kids is a natural truth-teller, much like I was at that age. However, the other two have dabbled in fibbing, despite our ongoing conversations about honesty. The first time one of them lied to me, I was both shocked and intrigued. I guess they say it’s a sign of intelligence, but it still makes me worry a little.
- Nose Picking: Nose picking seems to be a rite of passage for every child. It’s a gross habit that many eventually grow out of, but until then, it’s a constant battle. You’ll often find them sitting with their finger lodged in their nostril—just… ew.
- Hand-Washing After Using the Bathroom: We incorporated hand-washing into potty training from day one. We sang songs and discussed germs, yet it took years—about six or seven—for them to remember to wash their hands consistently on their own. I can now proudly add “expert hand-smeller” to my skills.
- Chewing with Mouth Open: “Please chew with your mouth closed!” is a phrase I’ve said more times than I can count, and it feels like talking to a brick wall. My child can chew loudly, completely oblivious to the sounds they’re making. I fear for their future dinner invitations!
- General Grossness: Just recently, I discovered my child’s dirty socks casually tossed on a friend’s kitchen counter. And that’s not all; imagine a kid from a seemingly perfect family using his brother’s toothbrush as a plaything. Our five-year-old has a tendency to lick every handrail at amusement parks. It’s enough to make anyone cringe!
Did we teach these behaviors? Not intentionally. Are they learning them elsewhere? Possibly. Do we do our best to guide them? Absolutely. Yet, clearly, not every lesson sticks. Raising responsible, socially savvy children takes time—at least 18 years, by my count!
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Summary
Parenthood comes with unexpected challenges, many of which I misunderstood prior to having children. From tantrums and whining to general grossness, the reality of parenting is a far cry from the judgments I once made. Each child is unique, and navigating their behaviors can be both a puzzling and humorous journey.