“Stop making excuses” was the caption of a recent post I stumbled upon, showcasing a mom proudly displaying her toned abs in the mirror. She went on to share how mothers should push past their limits and how her journey proved that anyone could achieve a body like hers with a little “dedication and hard work.”
I couldn’t help but feel a surge of frustration. The pervasive “What’s Your Excuse?” mentality behind such posts is not only offensive but also plays on our insecurities. Many of us already battle thoughts of inadequacy regarding our bodies—whether it’s the lingering baby weight or feeling out of shape. And then we see these posts that seem to scream, “You’re not good enough.” It’s no wonder we become overly critical of ourselves and hesitant to slip into a swimsuit during the summer. We imagine the judgmental gazes of others at the beach, whispering, “What’s your excuse?” It’s a relentless cycle of self-doubt.
Summer is a time when we should practice self-compassion, yet we often set ourselves up against unrealistic standards. We tell ourselves that happiness will come once we reach a particular weight or size, or worse, we shy away from swimming and other summer activities because we don’t feel “beach ready.”
A quick search for “beach-ready body” yields a slew of articles promising quick fixes, workout routines, and diet plans. It’s no surprise that many of us feel reluctant to wear our swimsuits with all this negative noise surrounding us. I’ve got stretch marks, a rounded belly, and I fluctuate between sizes 14 and 16. I work out regularly and feel strong, having brought life into this world. After nearly four decades, I’ve realized that my value as a woman and mother isn’t tied to my size. Yet, those “No excuses” posts sometimes make me doubt myself. In a sea of body-shaming headlines, the few body-positive messages about embracing our natural selves feel like rare gems. What I longed for was a simple affirmation: “Hey Mama, just be yourself. Your body is swimsuit-ready.”
And I’m here to tell you: Your body is indeed perfect for the beach. You don’t need any special diets or extreme workouts—just be you. Slip into that swimsuit! You deserve to enjoy the pool and belong at the beach. By loving our bodies as they are, we set a powerful example for our children.
Imagine the possibilities if we silenced those self-critical voices. What if, instead of shaming one another for our appearances, we offered support? What if we focused on conversations beyond body image? What if we recognized that there is no one-size-fits-all standard for beauty, allowing each of us to appreciate ourselves just as we are? What if we stopped perpetuating the myth that specific diets or exercise regimens could mold our bodies into an ideal? It’s time we grant ourselves grace and honor our bodies’ journeys and strengths through motherhood. What if more women wore their swimsuits confidently, stood in front during exercise classes, or simply wore shorts or sleeveless tops without hesitation?
There is no singular “ideal” body type. There isn’t a specific look that defines femininity, completeness, or beach-readiness. You are not broken and don’t need fixing. You are enough as you are. Your body deserves to enjoy the sun and sand. Your body is swimsuit-ready, waiting for you to embrace it.
This article was originally published on May 18, 2017.
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Summary
Your body is the right body for the beach—there’s no need for excuses or guilt. Embrace your unique self, love your body as it is, and enjoy summer activities without fear of judgment. It’s time to celebrate our bodies and show our children that confidence comes from self-acceptance.