It’s important to acknowledge that there are mothers who choose not to breastfeed, and their reasons are personal, valid, and deserving of respect. A mother who opts out of breastfeeding is no less dedicated or loving than one who embraces it—this is unequivocal.
However, many mothers enter parenthood with the desire to breastfeed, and unfortunately, a significant number find themselves unable to fulfill that aspiration. A study from 2012 in Pediatrics revealed that 85% of mothers intended to exclusively breastfeed for at least three months. Yet, the statistics tell a different story: the 2014 Breastfeeding Report Card from the CDC indicates that while 79% of mothers begin breastfeeding, only 40% are exclusively breastfeeding by three months, and a mere 18% maintain exclusive breastfeeding by six months. The Academy of American Pediatrics actually recommends exclusive breastfeeding for the first six months.
So, what’s happening?
Are mothers’ bodies failing them? Are babies not latching properly? Does biology simply have a flaw when it comes to breastfeeding?
As someone who has nursed both of my children—albeit with challenges—and as a lactation consultant who has supported numerous moms over the past seven years, I’ve concluded that, in most cases, it’s not the mother or the baby who falters; rather, it’s the system that falls short.
Now, don’t get me wrong; I acknowledge that there are instances where biological factors do play a role. While breastfeeding is a natural process, biological inconsistencies can hinder the production of a sufficient milk supply or affect a baby’s ability to nurse effectively.
That said, there are solutions and creative strategies that can help many mothers navigate these challenges. For instance, women who struggle with milk production often find ways to combine breastfeeding with supplementation to ensure their babies receive adequate nourishment. I’ve assisted mothers who have only one functional breast or who can only provide a fraction of their baby’s nutritional needs. Each woman defines her own success, and there are innovative methods to maintain a breastfeeding relationship.
Even babies with anatomical issues, like tongue ties or cleft palates, can successfully breastfeed with appropriate medical intervention and guidance.
The Lack of Resources
The issue lies in the fact that many mothers are unaware of the resources available to them. Many lack access to quality care, which is often not covered by insurance, and many are juggling other responsibilities that leave little room for resolving breastfeeding difficulties.
When breastfeeding challenges arise, they can take time to address—sometimes days, sometimes weeks. While many mothers receive a brief visit from a lactation consultant in the hospital, the level of support varies greatly. Some may receive thorough guidance, while others may feel rushed or inadequately assisted.
Once at home, mothers frequently find that breastfeeding is more complicated than it was in the hospital. They may experience engorgement or delayed milk production, leading to fussiness in their babies. Sore or bleeding nipples can also complicate the early days. It’s entirely normal for the initial weeks of breastfeeding to be challenging, and patience is crucial as adjustments are made.
Breastfeeding, while natural, is also a learned skill for both mothers and babies. New mothers shouldn’t be expected to navigate this journey alone. They need encouragement, information, and expert support to thrive.
Unfortunately, many mothers give up within the first few weeks due to a lack of help and resources. They face the overwhelming weight of household responsibilities and the pressure of returning to work, often before they’ve had the chance to establish a successful breastfeeding routine.
Comparative Support Systems
In other countries, mothers receive time to heal and learn to breastfeed, often supported by community initiatives or government programs that provide in-home assistance. In places where maternity leave is guaranteed, mothers aren’t preoccupied with returning to work just days after giving birth.
It’s clear that our system is flawed and fails to support breastfeeding mothers adequately. It’s easier for new parents to reach for a formula bottle than to seek affordable, compassionate breastfeeding support.
To any mother who feels she has “failed” at breastfeeding, let me reassure you: you did not fail. You put in tremendous effort and truly wanted it to work. You nourished your baby in the best way you could, formed a strong bond, and should feel no guilt. The lack of support, time, and resources is what truly let you down.
This situation is regrettable, and it’s time we acknowledge it.
Further Reading
For those interested in learning more about home insemination, visit this link for a comprehensive guide. Additionally, Indiana Fertility Institute offers excellent resources on this topic, and for a broader understanding of reproductive options, check out this Wikipedia page.
Summary
Many mothers desire to breastfeed, yet numerous barriers prevent them from achieving this goal. While biological factors can play a role, the lack of systemic support is often the real issue. Mothers need access to resources, expert guidance, and time to adjust to breastfeeding challenges. It’s essential to recognize that the shortcomings often lie within the system, not the mothers themselves.