Words of Wisdom for My 20-Year-Old (and Myself)

Adult human female anatomy diagram chartAt home insemination

As my daughter prepares to embark on her journey to Paris, I feel compelled to distill the wisdom I’ve shared over the years into lasting guidance. I often wake up in a panic, hoping that alongside her essential belongings, she has also packed her common sense and good manners. Each morning, I sneak into her room, thinking that perhaps a few whispered words of advice might resonate with her in her half-asleep state. While I want her to carry these lessons with her, some insights I wish I had embraced at her age are:

  1. Make Thoughtful Decisions: Your choices, from friendships to finances, will significantly shape your future.
  2. Stay Connected: Remember to reach out to family during this big transition; it’s a change for everyone involved.
  3. Beware of Credit Card Traps: If it’s not in your budget, it’s not a necessity.
  4. Breathe Fresh Air: Spend time outdoors, and don’t skimp on the sunscreen.
  5. Share a Smile: Offer genuine smiles to others; you never know who might need one.
  6. Support Young Entrepreneurs: Always buy lemonade from kids at their stands.
  7. Be Honest, But Thoughtful: Speak the truth, but be mindful of others’ feelings.
  8. Kindness Matters: Be nice, but maintain your boundaries; people may reappear in your life unexpectedly.
  9. Give Back: Volunteer your time and skills to those in need.
  10. Prioritize Sleep: Make sure to rest well at night and consider the benefits of a midday nap.
  11. Use the Buddy System: Safety in numbers is a timeless principle.
  12. Acknowledge Others’ Struggles: Everyone carries their own burdens, even if they’re not visible.
  13. Tip Generously: Always leave at least 15%—remember, waitstaff and kitchen staff have different roles.
  14. Look for Positivity: A positive outlook can be more beneficial than complaining.
  15. Seek Change If Unhappy: If you’re dissatisfied, consider what you can do differently.
  16. Practice Active Listening: Patience is key in conversations.
  17. Set Ground Rules with Roommates: Establish them early to avoid future conflicts.
  18. Return Borrowed Items in Good Condition: Treat others’ belongings as you would your own.
  19. Write Letters to Loved Ones: Handwritten notes, especially to grandparents, can mean a lot.
  20. Send Genuine Thank-You Notes: Texts and emails don’t count!
  21. Be Cautious with Loans: Lending money can complicate friendships; celebrate if they pay you back.
  22. Embrace New Experiences: Enjoy the journey and be open to trying new things.
  23. Don’t Fear Failure: Growth often comes from taking risks and making mistakes.
  24. Meet Deadlines: Pay attention to important dates to avoid stress later.
  25. Be Wary of Digital Footprints: Remember, online posts are permanent; adjust your privacy settings.
  26. Journal Your Experiences: Capture both joyful and tough moments, sharing when ready or keeping it private.
  27. Be Considerate: Don’t leave the gas tank empty or the toilet paper roll bare for others.
  28. Seek Advice, But Filter It: Take what resonates and leave the rest.
  29. Cultivate a Reading Habit: Read for pleasure, awareness, and growth; just read.
  30. Trust Your Instincts: If you wouldn’t want to share your decision with others, reconsider it.

I’ve noticed my daughter is gradually taking my advice to heart. Although she may never be a phone chatter, I’m encouraged by her choice of stationery and the journals she has recently acquired. The new planner she bought should help ease some of my parental worries.

Above all, I take pride in her adventurous spirit and her confidence to step into the world on her own. She embodies the best advice I received as a new mother: “Raise her to be a strong, independent woman who seeks to live life fully.”

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In summary, these lessons are not just for my daughter but also serve as reminders for myself. As she steps into adulthood, I hope she embraces these truths and navigates life with confidence and kindness.