Let’s break it down:
Harvey Weinstein has a long history of sexually harassing and assaulting women. If you’re a woman who has been in his presence over the past two decades, chances are you’ve faced pressure, intimidation, manipulation, or worse. It’s clear: he is a violent predator.
When the allegations surfaced, my initial reaction was something like this:
Seriously, what a jerk. Yep.
As I read through the accounts of his known abuses, I pictured Weinstein like a rampaging rhino, fueled by a crate of Viagra, charging through life with zero regard for the women around him, demanding massages and making unwanted advances. We’ve all encountered that kind of guy, right?
I won’t even dive into Weinstein’s pitiful excuse for an apology; it’s been scrutinized enough already. His pathetic claim about growing up in the ’60s (as if that’s an excuse) has been thoroughly dismantled. Women everywhere have made their voices heard loud and clear.
What I really want to discuss is how men are reacting to this scandal. It’s astonishing to see the shock expressed by various celebrities and everyday guys. Some commentators claim there must be “two Harvey Weinsteins,” as if this revelation is surprising. The idea that wealthy, powerful men can turn a blind eye to such predatory behavior seems absurd, yet they insist on maintaining their innocence. Jeffrey’s solution? Send out a vague email and donate to a charity—problem solved!
Everyone is so eager to condemn Weinstein’s actions! It’s appalling! Disgusting! I wouldn’t be shocked if Thesaurus.com crashed from all the publicists scrambling to find synonyms for “gross.”
Suddenly, these guys are proclaiming their love for their daughters, sisters, and wives as if that’s the key to caring about sexual assault. Really? Is that what it takes for men to recognize the seriousness of these issues?
Here’s a thought: Women are human beings too, deserving of respect, regardless of their relationships with men. Is that so hard to grasp?
These men seem to revel in their outrage, shouting about how they’re committed to preventing this from happening again. But honestly, if one more wealthy guy tells me how he’ll make sure nothing like this happens on his watch, I might lose it.
Gentlemen, I hear your outrage. You claim to be shocked, to care deeply, and to wish for a safer world. But let me break it down for you: I don’t really believe you. None of us can afford to.
You may think you’re the exception to the rule, but the truth is, most women are on guard. We’re waiting for the other shoe to drop. We’re waiting for you to say something dismissive or condescending, or for your true colors to show.
Yes, you may genuinely want to protect women from predators like Weinstein, but your shock suggests you’re out of touch. When you express disbelief that a known predator could behave as he did, it signals that you don’t engage with women’s experiences.
Conversations like this have likely occurred countless times over the years:
Female Actress (FA): “Harvey asked me to meet him alone in his hotel room.”
Male Actor (MA): “Oh, I’m sure it’s fine.”
FA: “I don’t know, it feels off.”
MA: “C’mon, it’s Harvey. You’re probably just nervous.”
FA: “Yeah, you’re right.”
Don’t be surprised, fellas. Your shock might be an attempt to empathize, but what it really shows is that you’re not listening to us. Look at the faces of women who have lived this reality. We’re not shocked; we’re exhausted.
Your astonishment isn’t helpful; it’s an insult. If you truly want to support women, start by believing us and listening to our stories.
And let’s not pretend you’re going to be the hero in a scenario you’ve never encountered. Condemning this behavior in the wake of a scandal is the bare minimum. True awareness requires recognizing the insidious nature of misogyny that exists in everyday interactions.
So, take a moment to reflect on your own behavior. Have you ever felt entitled to a woman’s time? Have you brushed off a complaint instead of standing up for her? Just because you’re not a specific type of predator doesn’t mean you’re free of culpability.
Every man has room for improvement regarding respect for women, and it starts with acknowledging that you have biases to confront.
If you want to be a better ally, stop being shocked. The world has known about men like Harvey Weinstein for ages. It’s time to stop pretending otherwise.
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In summary, the outrage over Harvey Weinstein’s actions shines a light on the broader culture of misogyny and the need for men to take responsibility for their behaviors. To truly support women, we must move beyond shock and start listening and believing in their experiences.