Merriam-Webster defines a “boomerang child” as a young adult who returns to live with their family, often due to financial constraints. But what if these adult children never leave their family home in the first place? This scenario can be labeled a “failure to launch,” indicating their struggle to achieve independence. As observed by writer Sarah Thompson in her article on young adults in The National Review, millennials are delaying traditional milestones such as finishing school, moving out, achieving financial independence, marrying, and starting families. Perhaps we should introduce a new term for those who opt to stay at home while pursuing their education: “Nesters.”
My partner and I experienced financial challenges during our own college years, especially since we were raising children at the same time. Balancing family responsibilities with educational costs was no easy feat, often leading us to rely heavily on student loans—debt that continues to linger as we work on modest teacher salaries. With this in mind, we wanted to ensure a different experience for our children. When they were just 5 and 2, we began contributing $400 monthly to an educational fund designed to cover their college expenses. This decision has proven invaluable, as our children, now 24 and 21, have managed to avoid student loans and can focus on their studies without the burden of juggling jobs.
Despite still living at home, our adult children are thriving, and we often find ourselves justifying this arrangement to others. Here are a few reasons why we believe it’s beneficial:
1. Mutual Agreement
We have a clear understanding with our children that as long as they continue making academic progress, they can reside with us. We cover their basic needs—food, shelter, and insurance—while they handle personal expenses like clothing and entertainment. Although life has thrown us a few curveballs, we remain committed to this framework. A survey by Future Financial revealed that 90% of young adults aged 18 to 24 feel significant stress due to economic uncertainty and job scarcity. By alleviating their financial worries, we enable them to focus entirely on their education.
2. Cultural Norms
In many collectivist societies—such as those found in various Asian, Hispanic, and Middle Eastern communities—multigenerational living is common. According to cultural expert Jessica Reyes, this lifestyle fosters strong familial bonds and support systems. While our household consists of just two generations, we maintain close ties with our extended family, who live nearby. We believe this closeness enriches our family life, especially in an era when many families face dysfunction.
3. Financial Realities
Let’s do the math. A college student earning $9 per hour while working 30 hours weekly would gross about $1,080 a month. With rent prices averaging $550 in our area for shared accommodations, this barely covers living expenses, not to mention utilities and food. Working this many hours also limits their time for studying. The alternatives—taking on debt, having parents financially support a separate household, or working more hours—are not ideal. For our family, these options would undermine the sacrifices we’ve made to keep our children debt-free.
4. Love and Support
We want to provide our children with every opportunity we can, ensuring they graduate without debt. This is crucial, especially considering the grim economic outlook for their generation. Experts like Dr. Emily Carter warn that many young adults today are facing unprecedented challenges, including high unemployment rates. By allowing our children to stay at home while they pursue their dreams, we aim to set them up for a successful future.
Some may argue that we are hindering our children’s independence by allowing them to live at home. However, both of our kids are strong-willed individuals who just happen to share our address. They enjoy their own space upstairs, which includes bedrooms, a bathroom, and a small living area they are responsible for. They come and go freely, and we often feel like empty nesters. While this arrangement may not suit everyone, it works for us. Perhaps there is wisdom in the traditions of collectivist cultures, and we are not the ones who are misguided.
In summary, supporting our adult children while they pursue their education is a mutually beneficial arrangement that fosters independence, strengthens family bonds, and alleviates financial stress. For more insights on family support, consider reading about home insemination kits at Make A Mom or exploring the signs of ovulation at Intracervical Insemination. Additionally, Women’s Health provides a wealth of information on infertility and related topics.