I’ve always had a deep affection for the holiday season. I start playing festive music as soon as November rolls around, deck the halls before Thanksgiving, and sometimes, I leave decorations up far longer than intended—mostly due to my own procrastination. However, one aspect of the holidays that doesn’t sit well with me is the sheer volume of gifts.
Before you brand me as a grinch, let me clarify. I genuinely enjoy both giving and receiving presents; it’s the overwhelming excess that troubles me. Much like my views on the pharmaceutical industry, I’m not a fan of what I call “Big Christmas.” I prefer a more organic, low-key approach to the holidays.
This year, there will be fewer presents beneath the tree. This shift didn’t happen overnight; it’s a trend we’ve gradually embraced over the past few years after some eye-opening experiences where our tree looked like a scene straight out of a viral social media post—okay, maybe that’s a slight exaggeration, but not by much.
In my family, we’ve always done Christmas in a big way, and it wasn’t limited to just my immediate relatives. Gifts poured in from grandparents, aunts, uncles, and even distant cousins. There were instances when we struggled to transport all the gifts home in one trip, our van practically overflowing with clothes, toys, and knick-knacks. It took weeks to find places for everything.
This abundance often led to pre-holiday stress and post-holiday letdowns. The chaos of clutter, the anxiety over credit card bills, and the guilt of consumerism can really overshadow the joy of the season. As a minimalist at heart, the thought of excess “stuff” can be overwhelming. Just glancing at a cluttered space can elevate my anxiety levels.
Over the years, we’ve experimented with various ideas to tone down our holiday frenzy into something more pleasant. Some strategies worked, while others didn’t. For example, we’ve found success with a “not-so-secret Santa” exchange among siblings, where each person gives a small gift along with a donation to a cause close to the recipient’s heart.
Yet our attempts to eliminate gifts entirely never gained traction, and I anticipated that outcome. After all, gift-giving is a way for people to express their love and thoughtfulness, especially for grandparents who derive joy from seeing their grandkids unwrap presents. I, too, find it hard to skip gifts for aunts, uncles, and cousins. There’s an undeniable pleasure in sharing a small token of affection.
So, completely eliminating gifts wasn’t the solution for us. However, we’ve discovered a way to downsize “Big Christmas” in favor of a more simplified holiday experience. While there may be fewer gifts overall, the focus shifts from material possessions to shared experiences.
I’m an advocate for gifting experiences—like a museum membership, a weekend getaway, or a cooking class. These options not only reduce post-holiday clutter, but studies suggest they also foster greater happiness. Research from Cornell University shows that we tend to feel more gratitude for experiences than material items, leading to more generous behavior. Isn’t cultivating gratitude what we truly want for ourselves and our children?
Additionally, experiences can enhance children’s intellectual growth. An Oxford University study found that a child’s academic success is more influenced by their home environment and parental interactions than by toys or gadgets. So while it might be tempting to buy that shiny new electronic device, simply spending quality time together has far greater benefits.
Too many toys and gadgets can contribute to feelings of overwhelm and dissatisfaction—the opposite of what we aim for with gift-giving. I recall the stress of finding space for a literal carload of stuff after the holidays; it’s not the joyful experience we hope for. Experts, like Joseph Goodman from Washington University, emphasize that experiences are often more fulfilling because they are unique and personal.
Moreover, choosing experiences over material gifts is also a step toward being kinder to the environment—after all, we don’t need more plastic toys cluttering our planet.
This year, we’re committed to continuing our trend of prioritizing experiences over things, and our extended family seems to be joining in. Instead of an avalanche of electronics and toys, we’ll be gifting camp registrations, planning a family getaway, and attending sporting events together. We’ll also make donations in each other’s names to causes we care about, and actually commit to doing these activities.
So while there may be fewer packages under the tree this Christmas, the gifts we share will carry much more meaning.
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In summary, this holiday season, we’re embracing a more meaningful approach by focusing on experiences rather than material gifts. The shift may lead to fewer items under the tree, but the memories we create together will be the true treasures of the season.