Let’s just be real: I don’t find pregnancy to be a beautiful experience. There, I’ve said it. It feels incredibly freeing to express this sentiment, almost like I’m running through a vibrant, wild meadow, my untoned body bouncing freely without a care in the world.
Now, I don’t want to be a total downer (I prefer the title “Realistic-Rita” for my role here), but I genuinely don’t feel beautiful during pregnancy. I’ve been itching to share this perspective for some time. When I hear other women rave about the beauty and empowerment of growing a new life, two thoughts cross my mind: 1) I’m genuinely happy for them, yet a touch envious of their experience; and 2) I sometimes wonder if they’re just putting on a show, feeling pressured to embrace every aspect of pregnancy to avoid the label of a “bad mother.”
While I can acknowledge that other women glow during this time, I can’t say the same for myself. Here’s a candid look at some of the realities I faced during pregnancy that certainly didn’t make me feel like a beauty queen—or even remotely attractive:
1. Leaky Breasts
When I was pregnant with my first child, I was completely unaware that leaking breasts were even a possibility. No one mentioned this to me (where were you on that one, Aunt Lisa?). At just 12 weeks along, I found myself at the grocery store, and the cashier—a young guy—started acting all flustered and awkward. I thought it must be my shirt with its catchy slogan. Little did I know, massive wet circles were forming right on my chest. The poor boy probably thought he was witnessing something bizarre. It was tragic, not beautiful. A leaky breast is confusing and alarming, not a lovely sight.
2. The Surprise Gas Incident
On our way to a wedding, my husband and I were met with a foul odor that could only be described as death incarnate. As I fumed, convinced he had passed gas, I let my emotions get the best of me (pregnancy hormones, you know). After a brief argument, it became clear that the culprit was me—I had unwittingly released my own gas into the atmosphere. Cue the tears! What was happening to my body? This was not the kind of surprise I wanted.
3. Vision Problems
During pregnancy, my eyesight took a nosedive. Suddenly, my contacts didn’t feel right, and I was squinting to see anything clearly. It was as if my body had decided my eyes were on a temporary vacation. With moisture being redirected to the baby, my eyes became painfully dry and blurry. I’m preparing for my next pregnancy by learning braille—because who knows what my vision will be like next time?
4. Uncontrollable Hair Growth
Anyone notice an alarming increase in leg hair growth during pregnancy? Just me? I found myself needing to shave every single day, which was a real challenge with my busy schedule. If only the no-shave movement had existed back then, I would have happily joined in.
5. Dry Skin Woes
I dealt with persistently itchy and dry skin, resulting in a ghostly appearance. As a naturally pale redhead, this was not a welcome addition. I looked like I was on the verge of collapse, and I could practically hear strangers wondering if I had any blood circulating in my veins. I looked so ghastly that I could have easily cast as an extra in a vampire film.
Despite all this, I don’t harbor any hatred towards the experience of pregnancy. I’ve had two relatively smooth pregnancies and would gladly do it again for my little ones. I’m grateful for the opportunity to become a mother, and who knows? I might not be done expanding my family.
But let’s be clear: I don’t feel beautiful, empowered, or desirable during pregnancy. I feel large, slightly blind, and gassy.
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Summary
Pregnancy can often be portrayed as a beautiful journey, but many women experience discomfort, unexpected bodily changes, and challenges that contradict this narrative. From leaky breasts to surprising gas incidents and vision problems, the reality of pregnancy can feel far from glamorous. While every woman’s experience is unique, it’s important to acknowledge the less-than-glamorous aspects of this life-altering stage.