As I reflect on my relationship with my teens, I recognize just how much they love me, even if they’ve made it clear they’d rather not spend the 4th of July with me. Instead, they plan to celebrate with their friends. While I would have enjoyed a day at the beach or a backyard BBQ together, I completely understand their choice—after all, I remember how torturous it felt to hang out with my parents during my high school years.
My daughter has a packed agenda for her summer break. She’s eager to get her nails done, celebrate her 16th birthday with a fabulous party (we’ve already picked out her dress), and visit a local farm to spend time with animals. I’ve assured her that we will make all of these plans happen—and even more.
Meanwhile, my youngest is busy turning our home into a mini forest. His room is filled with saplings sprouting from acorns he gathered in our yard, and we’ve made multiple trips to get seeds. I suspect there’s an entire ant colony hiding in one of his drawers, but as long as I don’t see it, it’s not my problem.
My oldest is now spending his evenings with his girlfriend and devouring more meat than I think is healthy. Yet, whenever he asks for something from the grocery store, I happily oblige, and we enjoy grilling together. Those moments are precious.
Yes, our teens have shown remarkable resilience during the challenges of the pandemic. They’ve come to appreciate the value of family, friends, their health, and the simple joy of engaging in everyday activities—things we once took for granted.
This summer, however, will be different. I’m determined to make it a season of “yes.” Last year, I found myself repeatedly saying no—no to movies, no to hanging out with friends, no to birthday parties, and no to ice cream outings because places were closed. Many parents, including myself, were saying no out of concern and necessity.
While my teens might not be super excited about me being their summer guide, they do have their own small requests that might not seem significant to others. They want to spend time with friends, and my daughter is thrilled to have a few guests at her birthday this year. My son is just excited to be back at work.
There will certainly be days when they’ll want more than one ice cream cone at our local dairy bar. They might ask to make s’mores at midnight and sleep outside on the deck, or bring our pet ducks into the house. I anticipate requests for thrift store trips and visits to the dollar store, which are among their favorite activities. And to every single request, I will say yes.
This will be our “Summer of Yes,” a time to engage in activities that bring us joy and foster a sense of normalcy. It’s a gift we didn’t have last year.
Just because my kids are older and may have forgotten the simple joys, such as a movie night or a spontaneous Slurpee run, doesn’t mean those feelings won’t return after the last year and a half we’ve endured. I feel incredibly fortunate that they’re here, healthy, and that I can say yes to their wishes this year.
This past year has provided us with valuable perspective, and if my kids want to stay up late watching movies and making pancakes at midnight, I’m all in. They’re fully embracing the moment, and I can see how grateful they are for my willingness to say yes. To me, those experiences are priceless.
Here’s to a fabulous “Summer of Yes!”
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In summary, this summer is all about embracing joy and connection with my teenagers by saying yes to their requests, cherishing the time we have together, and creating unforgettable memories.