After over 17 years of marriage (yes, I was a teen bride—no judgment, please), my husband and I occasionally find it challenging to keep the excitement alive in our intimate life. We’ve explored a variety of options: lingerie, toys, adult films—the usual suspects (and no, we’ve never used a drill). However, my favorite way to add some spice has been through creative pubic hair designs. Over the years, I’ve styled various shapes down there—hearts, arrows, even a martini glass. It suddenly hit me that I’ve been expressing my artistry through pubic hair! If a design doesn’t turn out quite right, I just turn it into an abstract piece, and the intimacy continues.
For my husband’s recent birthday, I decided to treat him with a Brazilian wax. I had never experienced waxing anywhere before, let alone a full Brazilian. I figured, why not go all in? I wanted to give him something special, so I thought I could sacrifice a little hair for the occasion.
As the appointment day approached, my nerves kicked in. When the technician arrived, I shot her a tentative look.
“First time?” she asked.
“Yep!” I replied, trying to sound upbeat.
She explained the process and how she’d start with the most sensitive areas. Then she lifted the blanket, revealing the reality of the situation.
“Uh, we need to trim some of this first,” she said, a hint of surprise in her voice.
Apparently, I had been a bit neglectful. I silently cursed my Italian heritage as she trimmed my hair with tiny scissors, which oddly tickled. I found myself giggling, feeling that laughter might be out of place considering the circumstances.
“Now let’s get started on the sensitive parts,” she said.
“I’ve given birth twice. How bad can this be?” I attempted to sound brave.
“Okay, here we go.”
Let me tell you, it went from zero to sixty in a heartbeat. Internally, I was screaming, while externally I managed a tight-lipped, “I’m fine.”
She pressed her hand against my pubic bone, likely to ease the pain, and I couldn’t help but think, “Harder! HARDER!”—definitely not the vibe I wanted to give off.
What followed was a long session of discomfort. Time seemed to stretch as I focused on not kicking her in the face. Breathe in. Breathe out. Hold still.
As promised, the first one was the worst, but the rest still had their own level of discomfort. After completing the wax, she applied a soothing ointment, but I was longing for a massage or even a moment to gather myself.
Yet, the awkwardness and pain weren’t the main reasons I’ll never get another Brazilian. There are three significant reasons:
- After the technician left, I slid off the table in a sweaty mess and hurried to the mirror for a look. I was horrified—not because I appeared like a prepubescent girl, but because I realized my pregnancy stretch marks extended all the way into my “tantalizing triangle.” They looked like greedy little fingers pointing the way down. Thankfully, my husband seemed unfazed by them and was quite pleased with the results.
- With all the hair gone, the sensation was heightened, and I found myself inexplicably aroused. This became a bit of an issue for me (though not for my husband). I was ready for action everywhere—at home, in public, even at the grocery store. Let’s just say we had quite a bit of fun that week!
- However, the bliss didn’t last long. As the hair began to grow back, I switched from ecstasy to agony. Apparently, I was not the ideal candidate for waxing. I quickly learned that I was prone to ingrown hairs, which were excruciating. I began joking with my husband that I looked like a character from “Game of Thrones” and that not even a Dothraki warrior would want to go near me.
So, that’s it for me and Brazilian waxing—forever. I’ll stick to my pubic hair art for a little excitement, and I’m contemplating a chili pepper design next.
For those looking to explore other options in parenting, check out our post on at-home insemination kits for additional insights. It can be a great alternative, especially if you’re considering options like fertility treatments. Also, for more information on pregnancy-related health issues, this resource is an excellent choice.
In summary, my experience with Brazilian waxing was filled with pain and awkwardness, leading me to conclude that I’ll stick to my creative pubic hair designs in the future.