In today’s world, the conversation surrounding breastfeeding in public has become increasingly prominent. Opinions on the subject generally fall into three categories: 1) breastfeeding should only occur in private; 2) breastfeeding is acceptable in public but should be covered; and 3) breastfeeding can happen anytime and anywhere. Personally, I resonate with the third group, but as a nursing mother, I often find myself adhering to the preferences of the first group.
Am I embarrassed? No, but my primary focus is on nourishing my child, and surprisingly, I share the mutual desire for modesty. After years of concealing my body, the thought of exposing myself in public feels uncomfortable. I don’t wish to elicit negative reactions or judgment from passersby—I’ve already faced enough body scrutiny during my teenage years.
While volunteering at an event for my older child, I took time to nurse my newborn in the car. The idea of breastfeeding in front of my daughter’s friends and their parents felt daunting—not due to their potential reactions, but because of my own comfort level. I can’t shake the feeling that breastfeeding in public attracts unwanted attention. Instead, I choose to nurse in the presence of those who support me, avoiding the judgment of strangers. Would I like to see a more accepting culture? Absolutely, but I am not prepared to be the one challenging societal norms regarding the appropriateness of breastfeeding.
The bond formed during breastfeeding is precious and fleeting. This intimate act is something special between my baby and me. If someone cannot witness this connection without feeling uncomfortable, I prefer to keep it private. It’s impractical to expect a blanket to stay in place when a baby is actively nursing. I’ve even joked about creating a “breast coozy” similar to those used for cans, as my breast gets chilly when exposed. Yet, I doubt even that would satisfy the demands of critics.
I understand the voices of activists urging mothers to breastfeed freely in public to normalize the practice. While a part of me wishes to join that movement, my anxiety often holds me back. During a family dinner, I notice my baby becoming increasingly fussy, signaling his need to nurse. I scan the restaurant for anyone who might react negatively—a thought that makes me reconsider my surroundings. I’d prefer to be in a private booth, away from prying eyes. When I return from the car with my nursing pillow, I find my baby has dozed off, and I feel a sense of relief.
Do I believe that breasts have been overly sexualized in our culture? It’s a complicated question. While my breasts serve a sexual purpose, they are also meant for nurturing my child. This dichotomy raises questions: which came first, the baby needing to be fed or the societal admiration of a woman’s breasts? Can both coexist peacefully? In this context, it’s crucial to understand that breastfeeding isn’t about sexuality.
One image that resonates deeply with me is a statue at the Our Lady of La Leche shrine in St. Augustine, Florida, depicting the Virgin Mary nursing baby Jesus. If this act represents pure innocence, why is breastfeeding so often viewed negatively in public? What makes the sight of a baby nursing so offensive? It seems that the very idea of an infant feeding on a mother’s breast contradicts societal norms regarding physical intimacy.
When I see another woman breastfeeding openly, I admire her confidence and often wish to express my appreciation. I support mothers sharing their journeys through social media, though I tend to keep my own breastfeeding photos private, only sharing them with close friends. I am the mom who seeks out a quiet dressing room or retreats to my car to feed my baby, prioritizing a calm atmosphere for this important moment. Until society evolves to embrace breastfeeding, I prefer not to turn my nursing sessions into a battleground for acceptance, though I commend those who do.
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In summary, while I personally prefer to breastfeed in private settings, I appreciate the efforts of those advocating for more open acceptance of breastfeeding in public. The journey of motherhood is unique to each individual, and every mother deserves the space to navigate it in her own way.