It’s been said that toddlers resemble zombies, and that the experience of motherhood is akin to navigating The Walking Dead. I can see the parallels—the drool, the nonsensical chatter, their insatiable urge to nip at anything that moves. But let’s take this analogy a step further: nearly every horror film we know and fear is, in some form, inspired by the antics of our little bundles of joy.
Cujo
That scene where the dog tries to break into the car? Clearly written by someone who underestimated the chaos of closing the bathroom door for a moment of peace.
Aliens
Remember the moment when the alien licks Sigourney Weaver’s face? That’s right out of the co-sleeping playbook—only a parent knows the struggle of a toddler testing the waters to see if you’re still awake.
Jaws
Every day, I fend off bites from my teething toddler. If you squint, the mast of that boat looks suspiciously similar to my kitchen stool, right?
The Exorcist
Let’s be honest, this entire film is about a toddler navigating their terrible twos. The infamous pea soup scene? We’ve all been there, trying to sneak veggies into a smoothie while they’re distracted.
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
The transformation of a sweet toddler into a monster post-nap? Classic.
28 Days Later
The rage virus? Absolutely real and thriving in toddlers. The only antidote is time, plain and simple.
Pet Sematary
The creators of this film knew exactly what they were doing by portraying a resurrected, angry Gage. Every toddler has the potential to unleash this level of fury; some just haven’t figured it out yet.
The Blair Witch Project
The chilling conclusion, where one character stands in the corner while another screams, mirrors my own daily life. Picture me in front of the fridge, mindlessly snacking as my toddler shouts “Mommmmmy!” a few billion times! I suspect one of the writers had a kid named Blair.
Rosemary’s Baby
How could I overlook this iconic evil baby film? While Adrian doesn’t get to reveal all his potential as a little demon, we all know the capabilities of a toddler.
Did I miss any? Let me know in the comments! For more insights on parenting, check out this post about the home insemination kit that could help you on your journey. For additional support on menstrual cycle irregularities, check out this resource. If you’re looking for comprehensive info on pregnancy and home insemination, Kindbody offers great guidance.
In summary, the parallels between horror films and toddler behavior are striking. From the monstrous transformations to the relentless demands, these movies reflect the chaotic, often hilarious reality of parenting.