When a high school acquaintance shared a note about her child’s “behavior” warning on social media, I was stunned. Was this really happening? Did a teacher actually send home a report about a kindergartner? My disbelief quickly turned to anger.
The note was sent home with my friend’s 5-year-old daughter, Mia, because she had “misbehaved” in class by playing with her shoelaces during circle time and engaging in other typical kindergarten antics, like stomping her feet. This “naughty note” not only publicly shamed Mia but also left her humiliated in front of her classmates for actions that are completely appropriate for her age. (Mia is a pseudonym; her mother prefers to keep her identity private.)
As a parent, I cannot fathom the thought of my children experiencing such shaming in their classrooms, which should be places of safety and support. As a former educator and education researcher, I am appalled that these outdated practices continue to be utilized in schools, despite overwhelming evidence suggesting they are ineffective and potentially harmful.
It’s time to eliminate disciplinary notes, color-coded charts, sticker systems, and public behavior tracking from our educational environments. Here’s why:
1. They Humiliate Children
These notes serve as public reminders of disobedience. Over time, consistent reminders of misbehavior can lead children to internalize negative self-perceptions. For instance, Mia might begin to view herself not as a typical child who occasionally fidgets, but as a “bad” kid who is disliked by her teacher.
2. They Fail to Address Underlying Issues
Often, children don’t grasp the specific reasons for their discipline, aside from the vague idea of “being bad.” These systems don’t teach kids why they should listen or how to behave appropriately in ways that align with their developmental stage.
3. They Damage Teacher-Student Relationships
Rather than being seen as a supportive guide, the teacher becomes a figure of punishment and fear, undermining trust.
4. They Foster Extrinsic Motivation
These systems teach children to care more about others’ judgments than their own goals. As writer and former educator Lisa Grant noted, “Without an intrinsic desire to succeed for personal reasons, the long-term benefits of these systems are negligible.”
5. They Cause Anxiety and Stress
Many children become anxious about their behavior charts, worrying about their standing even outside of school. I spoke with parenting expert Sarah Eames, who described how behavior charts can lead to humiliation and unnecessary anxiety. Some kids fear moving their names to a lower color, while others might adopt a “bad kid” identity simply because they feel defeated. A friend shared that her daughter became so distressed about the behavior chart in her kindergarten class that she no longer wanted to go to school.
6. They Disrupt Learning
Teachers end up spending valuable instructional time managing these systems instead of focusing on teaching.
The most egregious aspect of these disciplinary approaches, as highlighted by author Rachel Johnson, is their hypocrisy. Imagine if adults were subjected to similar scrutiny on a daily basis. Johnson writes, “Picture how effective we would be if our every misstep was tracked on a behavior chart—one grumpy interaction could send us spiraling downwards by 10 a.m.”
So, what can parents do? Start by discussing your concerns with the teacher. Understand her reasoning for implementing these methods. If you notice these disciplinary actions are ineffective for your child, communicate your observations and explore alternative strategies together. Remind your child that these charts do not define their worth or abilities.
Teaching is a challenging profession, and I empathize with educators. However, we must ensure that our classrooms do not create additional barriers to children’s learning and emotional well-being. For more insights on parenting and achieving success in these areas, check out our post on the best artificial insemination kits for home use or visit Medical News Today for valuable resources related to pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, it’s time to rethink the use of behavior charts in classrooms. They are not only ineffective but also damaging to children’s self-esteem and their relationships with teachers. Together, we can advocate for a more supportive and nurturing educational environment.