Last week marked my daughter’s sixth-grade graduation ceremony. The school showcased a heartfelt video juxtaposing the students’ baby pictures with their sixth-grade yearbook photos, a masterful yet heart-wrenching touch that had many parents wiping away tears. After the diplomas were handed out, the principal announced the commencement of the Presidential Awards, an accolade aimed at recognizing students who have consistently maintained a GPA above 3.5 from third grade through sixth grade.
As names were called, approximately a third of the graduating class returned to the stage to receive their awards. The applause filled the room, and I initially thought we had reached the end of the presentations, only to realize that this was just the first tier of achievements. Those honored in this group had GPAs ranging from 3.5 to 3.74, with two additional categories left to announce: 3.75 to 3.99, and a separate group for those who achieved a perfect 4.0.
For context, my children attend a choice school that emphasizes STEM education and has a demanding curriculum. Admission is competitive, with many applicants vying for a limited number of spots, resulting in a student body predominantly comprised of high achievers. Thus, it was a truly uplifting scene to witness nearly every sixth grader being called to receive a Presidential Award. The excitement was palpable, with parents cheering proudly, but amid the celebration, I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of sadness for my daughter, who was among the very few — perhaps even the only one — not to be recognized.
My daughter has greatly enjoyed attending this school, yet her journey has been challenging. Diagnosed with ADHD in second grade, we faced numerous hurdles from preschool onward. It wasn’t until midway through third grade that we began medication to assist her focus and learning. Despite the struggles, including countless meetings with teachers, late-night homework battles, and missing assignments, we eventually found an effective treatment. This past semester, she achieved straight A’s for the very first time, a feat that filled me with pride; however, that’s not the crux of my message. Even if her grades had only been average, her effort was commendable.
The reality is that children who labor diligently for a C grade often go unnoticed. While it’s essential to celebrate the accomplishments of high-achieving students, we inadvertently overlook those who face challenges, such as ADHD, anxiety, autism, or other conditions that complicate their academic experience.
When my daughter approached me post-ceremony, tears welling in her eyes, she said, “Mom, I think I was the only one who didn’t get a Presidential Award.” She observed the disparity, feeling the weight of her hard work and the exclusion from recognition. Fortunately, she’ll be alright; once her report card arrives, we’ll celebrate her achievements in our own special way.
However, I can’t help but think of other children who endure similar experiences year after year. If you’re the parent of one of these kids, you are acutely aware of their efforts and your own. You know that commitment doesn’t always equate to tangible success, and that sometimes, your child must exert twice the effort just to achieve a passing grade.
I want to clarify that I’m not diminishing the accomplishments of straight-A students; they deserve every bit of recognition for their hard work. Instead, I wish to acknowledge the parents of children who strive tirelessly yet remain unrecognized. I see you. I see your child. I see the effort you both put in. I recognize the moments when you feel compelled to be overprotective, even if you had promised yourself otherwise, because your child would struggle without your support.
While your child may not receive an award adorned with the signature of the President, your resilience and dedication deserve immense respect and admiration. And so does your child.
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In summary, while awards ceremonies can be a source of joy, they can also highlight disparities among students. It’s crucial to recognize the efforts of all children, especially those who face unique challenges. As parents, we must celebrate our children’s perseverance, regardless of the accolades they receive.