March 14, 2023
Last night, you missed your child’s bedtime. Whether it was due to a late work meeting, unexpected traffic, or a community service commitment that ran longer than intended, it’s irrelevant now. The important thing is that you wished to be home with your kids.
You recognize this, your children understand this, and most importantly, this truth resonates deep within you. Yet, the anxiety lingers. You find yourself stretched thin, juggling numerous responsibilities at work and home, all while trying to meet everyone’s needs for your time and attention. You tackle your tasks at work diligently, and when you’re home, you pour your love into your children. You are indeed a wonderful parent.
However, doubts creep in. You wonder if you’re doing enough or making the right choices for your family. Let me reassure you: you are absolutely, positively doing right by them.
Let’s address the core truth: you love your children. This is evident to you and them. Yet, you may fear that your absence at certain events—like a baseball game or a piano recital—casts a shadow on your dedication as a parent. You might think that it diminishes your love and commitment. But this is simply not true. Stop that negative self-talk.
There are countless ways to express love for your children, and it doesn’t hinge on being present for every single event in their lives. Providing for your family often involves long hours at work to ensure they have the necessities: food, shelter, and even those coveted baseball cleats and piano lessons. Being a dedicated parent means prioritizing your children’s needs, even if it means missing a game or concert occasionally.
Let’s be real: as parents, we consistently place our children’s needs above our own. Our actions are driven by an unwavering love and a desire to create meaningful memories for them.
You might also be concerned about missing out on family moments during late work hours, business travels, or weekend commitments. However, reflect on the lessons you’re imparting to your children. You’re teaching them about the value of hard work, the importance of making sacrifices, and that life involves difficult choices. You are demonstrating that your life extends beyond just their needs, reminding them that the universe does not solely revolve around them.
You are not neglecting your children by working late occasionally. I see the depth of your love for them. Your face lights up when they enter the room. After a long day, you might leave little notes under their doors or sneak sweet messages into their lunchboxes. During travels, you connect via FaceTime, giving them a virtual tour of your hotel room and sending them kisses before bedtime. At day’s end, you offer them your full attention, including personalized tuck-ins. You create stories and songs for them—things the “always present” parent may not always have the energy to do.
Through your dedication—whether you’re present or away—you are equipping your children with the skills to become kind, responsible adults. Remember, you’re doing a fantastic job even when you can’t be there for every occasion.
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Summary:
Being a dedicated parent doesn’t mean being present for every moment. Balancing work and family life often leads to missed events, but this doesn’t diminish your love or commitment. Your actions, whether at home or away, teach your children valuable lessons about hard work, sacrifice, and love. You are doing an exceptional job as a parent, even when you can’t be there for everything.