I’ve long held onto my pessimism as if it were a badge of honor. For years, I convinced myself that optimism was a trait for the naïve. I believed it was wiser to remain perpetually alert for the worst possible outcomes rather than risk being blindsided by unexpected misfortune. Where an optimist might see a cloudy sky as a sign of much-needed rain, I anticipated a deluge that would inevitably lead to a costly roof leak, not to mention a flooded yard due to a mainline break from the saturated soil.
Yes, that’s the pessimist in me.
But this year marked a turning point—this is my year of optimism.
My path toward a more positive outlook began in January when several inspiring women writers invited me to discuss our writing aspirations for the upcoming year. Despite my discomfort with the idea—after all, openly expressing my goals felt like tempting fate—I accepted. In our meeting, we each decided to choose a theme to guide our goals, encouraging us to step beyond our comfort zones. The phrase “Determined Optimism” sprang to mind, but it felt contradictory; the word “determined” seemed to weigh down the cheerfulness of “optimism,” which I had always dismissed as foolishness.
So, I ultimately abandoned the idea of a theme. For weeks, I panicked, convinced I would remain as unproductive as ever.
However, the seeds of optimism had been sown. I started to notice how my own pessimistic outlook was affecting my son, Sam. At just 11 years old, he would groan in frustration if his artwork didn’t turn out as he envisioned. “It’s awful,” he would say, even when I saw something remarkable. If we were late for a movie or if he received a lower grade than expected on a math quiz, he jumped to the worst conclusions: we’d miss the film, or he’d fail math entirely. Hearing my own bleak outlook echoed in him was painful, and it broke my heart to see him stressed over events that likely wouldn’t occur.
Recently, while driving home from school, Sam said, “I don’t think I did well on my quiz today.” His tone was disheartened, reminiscent of my own voice. I tightened my grip on the steering wheel. But then, he continued, “But you know what? I’ll do better on the next one.”
I relaxed my grip and glanced at him in the rearview mirror. “That’s right.”
He smiled, looking genuinely hopeful. “I decided to focus on the positive this year. It’s one of my resolutions.”
Was this my son speaking? Where did he learn such wisdom? “That’s a great goal,” I replied. “What inspired that?”
He recounted how during a photography class, he had fallen off the playset and accidentally chipped his camera lens. “The art teacher said she’d take it apart for an art project,” he shared, his face lighting up. “She didn’t get mad; she found a silver lining. She’s an optimist, and I thought that was a cool way to look at things.”
Sam’s excitement and calmness were strikingly different from my own anxious thoughts, which immediately jumped to concerns about potential school fees for the lens—or worse, imagining he could have hurt himself seriously. While I saw disaster, he saw opportunity.
In that moment, I realized that my tendency to envision worst-case scenarios had clouded my ability to appreciate his teacher’s generous and creative response to his incident. My son, in his budding optimism, recognized the chance to explore the inner workings of a camera, which only fueled his passion for art, allowing him countless peaceful hours spent sketching and dreaming of becoming a cartoonist or architect.
Pessimists tend to worry, while optimists dare to dream.
It’s time for me to relearn how to dream—calmly and confidently. So, this year, I’m casting aside anxious pessimism. Bring on the optimism. You’ll find me in the corner, diligently working toward my writing goals, convinced that I can achieve them.
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Summary
In my journey to embrace optimism, I learned valuable lessons from my son. As he started to focus on positivity, I realized the impact of my own pessimism on him. This year, I’m committed to changing my perspective, letting go of fear and anxiety, and welcoming a future filled with hopeful dreams.