Dear Middle Child,
Hello, my sweet one. It’s your mom reaching out to you.
First off, I want you to know just how incredible you are. Your intelligence, humor, passion, and so many other qualities shine brightly, even if I don’t mention them as often as I should.
I notice you, truly. But I sometimes wonder if you realize that I see you standing in between your siblings. You don’t have the thrill of being the first to achieve milestones or the nostalgia of being the last to do so. Sometimes, it might feel like you’re a bit overlooked amid the joys and challenges that come with having an older and a younger sibling.
Understanding Your Unique Role
As my middle child, there are a few important things I want you to understand. Yes, it’s a reality that you may not always receive as much of our attention as your siblings do. Despite my best efforts, I’ve seen this pattern unfold repeatedly. With our eldest, we navigate each new experience together—it’s all uncharted territory for us. Consequently, they tend to draw a lot of our focus. And the youngest? Well, they are the baby, and everything they do feels like the last time we’ll experience it. We’ve learned to savor those moments, which often results in them getting a bit more attention.
Yet, I want you to know that while it may seem your siblings are in the limelight, that’s not entirely true. You are the heart of our family—the sweet, essential center. You’re not on the outskirts; you are integral to our family dynamic.
Your Unique Advantages
Being a middle child doesn’t solely define you. You are uniquely you, and while your position may influence your experiences, it’s essential to recognize the advantages that come with it. You get the chance to embrace both the younger sibling and older sibling roles. This unique perspective shapes you in ways that your siblings may not fully appreciate.
Your closer age to your siblings allows for special bonds and shared memories, unlike what older and younger siblings might experience. You’re free from the heavy expectations often placed on the oldest, and you’re not burdened by the constant need to keep up like the youngest might feel.
Being in the middle means you get to enjoy family moments to the fullest. The oldest and youngest often miss out as they come and go at different times, but you are here for the duration.
Embracing Your Journey
Sure, there are times when being the middle child can be tough, and you might crave a more defined role. But remember, that flexibility also allows you the freedom to be whoever you want to be. Research even indicates that middle children often develop open-mindedness and strong negotiation skills—traits that will benefit you throughout your life.
However, studies also suggest that middle children might feel more distanced from their parents than their siblings. This is something I am committed to changing. You are just as much my child, my heart, and my joy as your older and younger siblings. I want you to feel secure in your place in our family and in my life.
You, my extraordinary middle child, please forgive our occasional shortcomings as parents, and embrace your unique role. As you journey through life, always remember that you are loved, completely and unconditionally.
Love,
Mom