Does your family have established guidelines for cellphone usage? Or do you navigate it on a case-by-case basis? These are the questions posed by Alex Turner, a parent of four, as her 13-year-old son gets his first cellphone. He saved up to purchase the device and will contribute to the family plan using future earnings. While the family has set limits on other technologies—such as no TV during the week and unlimited viewing on weekends—cellphones remain a new challenge.
Currently, they have one main rule: Mom has access to the phone’s passcode and the passwords for any social media accounts. She also provided him with a guide on digital etiquette and safety: “We’ve had numerous discussions about the public nature of every interaction, and while you may trust a friend not to share a text or screenshot a Snap, can you really trust their older sibling if they pick up your phone? Those caught in the public eye due to an unexpected video or tweet become examples in our ongoing lesson about the risks of modern communication.”
However, a significant concern beyond screen time or public scrutiny is how cellphone usage might alter family dynamics. Turner’s daughter expressed worries that her brother would become absorbed in his phone and stop engaging with her. This led to an important conversation: “‘I don’t want you to prioritize your phone over us,’ I said. There was this heavy silence as he processed my words. It was a pivotal moment. Suddenly, I understood what it meant. ‘Do you think I do that to you?’”
As technology advances and children mature, families must establish new boundaries. At the very least, parents can take away this advice: Review your messages before hitting “send.” For more insights, check out this related blog post on family communication.
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Summary
Establishing reasonable cellphone usage guidelines for tweens can help maintain healthy family dynamics and promote responsible technology use. Open communication about digital etiquette and safety is essential to navigate the challenges posed by modern devices.