Recently, I attended my annual gynecological appointment. While I was apprehensive about the usual procedures—such as the breast exam, pap smear, and the uncomfortable crinkly paper—my experience turned out to be surprisingly positive and validating.
As a nonbinary individual, entering spaces that require me to state my identity often brings on a wave of anxiety. Many people share this discomfort when visiting medical facilities. After all, we seek medical care to maintain our health, which is vital for overall well-being. Even routine check-ups can be stressful when the possibility of health issues looms, and nobody needs the added pressure of being misgendered or treated in a diminutive manner.
I specifically choose an LGBTQIA+ friendly practice to mitigate these concerns, but if every clinic prioritized this level of care, all patients would benefit from the respect and attention they deserve.
The atmosphere is established from the moment I walk into what is typically labeled a women’s OB/GYN clinic. The staff does not presume my gender; rather, they ask for my preferred name and pronouns on the intake form. This simple gesture reassures me that my identity is honored and valued. Even if no transgender individuals visit, my doctor’s office is setting a standard by normalizing the practice of inquiring about how to appropriately address someone, rather than assuming all patients are female.
There are numerous transgender men who possess a uterus, vagina, and breasts. Being transgender does not necessitate surgical intervention to affirm one’s gender identity. However, living in a body that feels misaligned can lead to significant dysphoria for many, including myself. My doctor is aware of this and we’ve discussed gender-affirming surgery, though I’m not in a position to pursue it right now.
When my doctor checks in with me about my feelings regarding my “female” body, she is also assessing my mental health. I don’t expect my gynecologist to act as my therapist, but as a medical provider, she should be mindful of the mind-body connection and its impact on our health. This expectation should apply to all patients. Before delving into physical health concerns, a doctor should first understand the mental well-being of the individual in front of them. I don’t receive special treatment for being queer; I receive basic human decency because I deserve it.
The staff at my OB/GYN office seems to anticipate triggers and takes steps to mitigate them, even seeking consent where appropriate. For example, while updating my records, the nurse asked if I wanted to be weighed and, after I agreed, she inquired whether I wanted to know the number. Many of us carry the burden of weight-related shame, and for some, knowing the scale’s reading can trigger dysphoria. This awareness is not exclusive to the LGBTQ community, but my providers’ sensitivity to body positivity is commendable. Their questions extend to aspects of sex, safety in relationships, and menstruation.
Before my physical exam commenced, my doctor clearly articulated what would happen, including where and when she would touch me, and sought my permission. Just because I was there for an exam did not mean I was obliged to consent or that I had to be ready. I maintained control over my body, my choices, my comfort.
It’s particularly challenging for LGBTQ individuals to feel secure and respected in medical environments, which often leads to postponing vital self-care. It’s draining and daunting to constantly explain and defend our identities. Forms that ask for gender, sex, and sexual orientation can feel alienating, as they often assume a heteronormative, cisgender identity. How can we focus on our health when our minds are preoccupied with self-doubt and fear?
Finding a clinic that honors my pronouns allows me to concentrate on my health concerns without the distraction of anxiety over how I will be treated. A practice that demonstrates empathy during sensitive procedures—like breast exams for breasts that cause me distress—enables me to ensure my health without compromising my mental well-being.
No one enjoys undergoing procedures like cervical screenings, but those of us requiring gynecological care deserve an experience that is as comfortable as possible, despite the inherent discomfort of the visit. If more OB/GYN offices were inclusive and affirming, patients would likely seek medical care more frequently and earlier. By treating all patients as if they identify somewhere along the LGBTQIA+ spectrum, clinics could provide compassionate and inclusive care for everyone, regardless of gender or sexual orientation.
In summary, we desperately need more OB/GYN clinics that prioritize inclusivity and respect for all identities, as this would significantly enhance the healthcare experience for everyone seeking gynecological care. For further insights on fertility options, check out this excellent resource on the IVF process, and for more information on fertility boosters, visit our blog on artificial insemination kits. Additionally, you can read more about donor insemination at this authoritative source.