By: Clara Jennings
Date: Dec. 28, 2016
Image Credit: Felix Mizioznikov/Shutterstock
Recently, I witnessed a truck breeze through a red light. Fortunately, no vehicles were approaching the intersection, so the truck continued on without incident. While it was alarming, it was clearly an error — the truck had out-of-state plates, the driver wasn’t speeding, and a quick tap of the brakes indicated that he realized his mistake. He was likely shaken and frustrated with himself for being so distracted.
However, the woman in the car ahead of mine, who also saw the incident, looked as if she might explode. She flung her hands into the air and practically leaned out of her window to angrily gesture at the truck, even as it disappeared from view. For the rest of the time we sat at the light, she continued her tirade — in her car, alone. It made me wonder, if she reacted so intensely in this instance, what must her demeanor be like in everyday life? Does she exist in a perpetual state of agitation and unhappiness?
Yes, the truck did run a red light, and had there been a vehicle approaching, it could have ended poorly. But accidents happen — they are, by definition, unintentional. Most of the time, responsible individuals are not thinking, “Hey, let me do something reckless that will infuriate strangers!”
This incident got me reflecting on the rudeness, impatience, and negativity that seem to pervade our world. As a writer, I share my parenting experiences and personal blunders in hopes that they resonate with others. Yet for every supportive “me too!” I receive, there’s often someone who responds with a dismissive comment, such as, “That was a waste of my time,” or “You shouldn’t be a parent.”
I notice it in various settings — when a cashier takes a little too long, and the customer huffs with annoyance; when a server is reprimanded for a minor kitchen mistake; or when impatient drivers tailgate slower vehicles. What does this behavior achieve? Absolutely nothing. Being irate won’t change the situation; it only spreads negativity, likely ruining moments for both you and others. Given that our time is limited, why squander it on frustration over things beyond our control? And why pass that negativity onto others?
I’m not claiming that I am immune to frustration or impatience. I don’t float through my day on a cloud of positivity. But when I feel irritation creeping in, I consciously choose to practice compassion. I try to empathize with the person causing my annoyance. It’s not always easy, but it is essential.
Let’s give each other a break. Every one of us — you, me, your doctor, your favorite server — is human. We all have off days, and we may not know what someone else is going through. Their temporary shortcomings might inconvenience us, but remember: at some point, you too will be an inconvenience to someone else. When that happens, would you prefer compassion or frustration from others?
Since my children were young, I’ve encouraged them to pause and ask themselves three words: “help or hurt?” Will their response improve the situation or just hurt someone’s feelings? If it’s the latter, it’s best to let it go. The world could use more empathy and kindness. It’s a lesson mothers have taught for generations: If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
So, if you found this to be the “worst article ever” or feel like you’ve wasted five minutes of your life, that’s your prerogative. But I kindly ask you to keep those thoughts to yourself and move on.
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Summary:
This article discusses the importance of extending grace and understanding to others in everyday situations, emphasizing that everyone makes mistakes and deserves compassion. It encourages readers to pause before reacting negatively and to consider the impact of their responses. By fostering kindness and empathy, we can improve our interactions and the overall atmosphere around us.