Parenting
During my seventh month of pregnancy with my second child, I found myself waddling into a client meeting in the sweltering August heat of Washington, DC. Squeezing into a chair, I was horrified to find three conspicuous sweat stains across my belly and two colorful Paw Patrol stickers strategically placed on my dress. My eldest had decorated me that morning, and I had completely forgotten about it.
To my relief, the clients were fellow moms, and we shared a hearty laugh. However, that moment struck me as a warning sign. If I couldn’t even remember to check for stickers, how could I possibly manage life with two children? I turned to the women at the table, asking, “How do you manage to get everything done?” What I really wanted to know was, “How do you keep your sanity intact amidst the chaos?”
Their responses were polite, yet none offered a concrete solution. Fast forward two years, and I continue to navigate the challenges of being a working parent while my husband holds a full-time job. My commute ranges from 45 minutes to an hour and a half, depending on traffic, and my kids attend different daycare centers, requiring multiple stops each day. Through this journey, I’ve uncovered the truth about managing it all: I don’t. In fact, I’ve made conscious choices to eliminate certain tasks from my life, which has been crucial in maintaining my sanity. Here are five key areas where I’ve opted for simplicity:
- Meal Preparation
In my quest for nightly dinners, I exhausted myself trying various strategies: bulk cooking on Sundays (which is nearly impossible with two kids clinging to me), meal delivery services like Blue Apron (which still required cooking), and slow cooker recipes (that assumed I’d be back in time). Ultimately, I decided to forgo cooking altogether. I now rely on two different meal delivery services that provide healthy and delicious dinners for my family twice a week. This change has not only saved me time but also reduced food waste, making it cost-effective too. - Errands and Shopping
Gone are the days of visiting Target or Walmart. Everything—from prescriptions to diapers—gets delivered to my doorstep. While some people find joy in running errands, I don’t. I’ve also stopped grocery shopping; instead, I use services like Instacart for snacks and lunches. My husband enjoys the occasional trip to Costco, so he handles that once a month. It’s been nearly a year since I set foot inside a grocery store, and I find it incredibly freeing. - House Cleaning
Most days, my home resembles a war zone. Toys litter the floors, beds go unmade, and piles of mail gather on the counter. Laundry is only done when absolutely necessary, and it often ends up in a basket rather than being folded. Even my car looks like a snack factory exploded inside it. Every other Sunday, my husband and I engage in a frantic cleanup, and on Mondays, a cleaning service transforms our home back into a livable space. I’ve learned that cleanliness doesn’t equate to tidiness, and I’ve let go of the need for everything to be in order. - Fitness Routines
I manage to work out three to four times a week, but I made a significant investment in home gym equipment a few years ago. My workout area is a small corner of my basement, but it gets the job done. Instead of spending hours searching for workout videos online, I now pay a modest fee for an app that tells me exactly what to do. This investment has saved me an immense amount of time. - Weekend Attire
During the workweek, I put effort into my appearance—makeup, stylish shoes, and accessories. However, weekends are a different story. I prefer to wear comfortable sweatpants, sports bras, and t-shirts that allow me the flexibility to chase after my toddler or sneak in a quick nap.
There are other areas where I’ve relaxed my standards too, like not adhering strictly to bedtime routines or letting my son choose his own clothes. Letting go of these minor pressures has made a world of difference, enabling my husband and me to enjoy quality family time.
I acknowledge that the ability to drop these tasks is a privilege. Not every mother has the same options available. However, if you find yourself in a similar position—fortunate enough to have a stable financial situation and a fulfilling career—I encourage you to consider lightening your load.
Remember, your worth as a parent is not defined by your exhaustion, nor is your child’s happiness directly correlated with the tidiness of your home. Do less—much less—and focus on loving more.
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Summary
The article discusses the challenges of balancing work and motherhood, revealing that the author does not attempt to do everything. Instead, she has made strategic decisions to cut out tasks like cooking, running errands, cleaning, gym trips, and worrying about weekend outfits. By focusing on what truly matters and letting go of less important responsibilities, she has created a more enjoyable family life.
