A few weeks back, my children stumbled upon some old photo albums from their early years. Among the cherished baby pictures were a few questionable snapshots from a pre-parenthood trip to Ireland with friends. I say they “stumbled upon” these albums even though they were right there on a shelf in our dining room, as they’ve become background noise in our home—overlooked and forgotten.
When my eldest child was born, I was consumed by documenting every milestone. His first smile, laugh, and tooth were celebrated as if he were the first baby to achieve these feats. I captured every moment—rolling over, sitting up, and crawling—sending updates to family and friends, many of whom were indifferent to my joyous announcements about his newfound love for mashed bananas.
Parenting books advised me that these milestones were vital to record, that I would cherish these memories later. Yet, looking back, I find that the typical milestones have faded from my memory. I struggle to recall my sons’ first words or exactly when they reached various developmental stages. Truthfully, I don’t even feel a strong urge to remember them.
A few weeks ago, I read a heartfelt piece by Lisa Bennett that resonated deeply with me. She emphasized that it’s the intimate moments we hold onto, even if our children won’t remember them. It’s the tickle fests, gentle kisses, and the joy of holding tiny feet that linger in our hearts. While I may not recall any tickle fests and those early months were more tearful than tender, I have my own collection of unforgettable moments—like dancing in the living room, long walks in the stroller, and more dancing.
However, intertwined with those sweet memories are countless parenting moments I can’t seem to erase, no matter how hard I try. For example, I will never forget the time my child had an unfortunate accident in the bathtub, or the first time he threw up in public—and yes, even on me.
I’ll always remember the diaper blowout that required scissors to remove his onesie, or the shocking moment he peed on me the very first day we were home from the hospital. I won’t forget the call from his preschool teacher about his “potty language,” or when I caught him exploring himself, wondering if that was normal—because, really, who doesn’t have those moments?
And let’s not overlook the first time he uttered a curse word, which took every ounce of self-control not to laugh at. I realize that while I may forget some of these instances (motherhood can be quite the brain fog), I’ll always have this list as a reminder of the wild and chaotic journey that parenting truly is.
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Summary
Parenting is a blend of sweet memories and unforgettable moments that often come from the chaos. While traditional milestones may fade, the real experiences—like diaper disasters and unexpected words—remain etched in our minds. Resources like CCRM IVF and information on at-home insemination kits can offer support as you navigate this incredible journey.