In discussions about mental health, one of the most common inquiries is how individuals manage their struggles during difficult times. For many, including myself, the answer is often unsettling: we don’t manage at all.
When my mental health deteriorates, I frequently find myself trapped in bed for days, detached from reality. I neglect basic self-care, often failing to eat, drink, or even get out of bed. My college schedule consists of classes on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, which I must attend regardless of my mental state. It may seem unappealing, but there are times when I wear the same outfit for an entire week, making it obvious to others when I’m struggling with hygiene. Brushing my hair feels like an insurmountable task; I simply roll out of bed and head to class.
The most distressing aspect of my decline is often my personal hygiene. Remaining in bed, day after day, in the same clothing takes a toll on one’s sense of self. There are instances when I go a week or longer without bathing—a fact I recognize is unpleasant but true. This neglect stems from an inability to confront myself, as being alone often exacerbates urges to self-harm.
I have attended college with unkempt hair, unwashed skin, and an overall unpleasant odor. I feel disgusted by my condition, yet, in the moment, it’s as if I’m incapable of caring. The effort required to simply exist consumes all my energy, leaving little room for self-care.
The stark reality of living with mental illness is often unsettling, yet it’s important to share these experiences. I hope that by opening up, I can find healing and, in time, learn to manage my illness more effectively during challenging periods.
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In summary, grappling with mental illness can lead to neglecting personal hygiene and self-care. It’s a difficult yet real experience that deserves acknowledgment, and sharing these stories may foster understanding and support for those who feel alone in their struggles.