Friends, it pains me to admit this, but I feel compelled to share. I used to judge those who seemed to have constant “oops” moments leading to unexpected pregnancies. I mean, we’re adults—we understand how reproduction works, right? But now, I find myself in the same boat.
Despite meticulously tracking my ovulation and not really wanting a fifth child, my partner and I often forego condoms during intimacy. Thanks to nature, I find myself wanting to connect with someone other than my favorite band member only during my fertile window. This leads to a nerve-wracking two-week wait to discover if I’m pregnant. Since I refuse to spend $15 on just two pregnancy tests (seriously, what a rip-off!), and I’ve run out of the bulk test strips I used to rely on, I’m left in a fog of uncertainty where every premenstrual symptom could signal a pregnancy.
It’s overwhelming. There have been more than a few occasions where I told my partner about my ovulating status and insisted we use protection, yet when the moment arrived, we often skipped it. What can I say? We enjoy living on the edge.
The truth is, this situation is entirely preventable. I grasp the basics of human biology, have successfully conceived four times, and have written extensively about fertility and pregnancy. So, why am I behaving like this?
Personal Preferences and Responsibilities
For starters, I genuinely dislike condoms. It might be irrational, but I can’t shake the aversion. I always have them ready, yet they never seem to make an appearance.
Secondly, I refuse to return to hormonal birth control. After spending over a decade on it and then having four children back-to-back, I feel I’ve done my time. Why should the burden of birth control fall solely on me? While I understand that another pregnancy would be a more significant challenge, why is it my responsibility alone to prevent it?
I’ve considered getting a copper IUD, but that’s not something I want. A tubal ligation is also off the table, even though I would have considered it if my last pregnancy had required a C-section. I’m done with additional responsibilities regarding birth control.
Partner Dynamics
Why can’t my partner just get a vasectomy? The procedure is straightforward: watch a video, schedule an appointment, and it’s done. It’s a minor outpatient procedure, and he could be back to normal life in just a few days. My partner is not opposed to the idea; he just hasn’t made the time to schedule it. It’s been 4.5 years since our last baby—come on!
Furthermore, men need to understand how the female reproductive system operates. When I told my partner I was four days late, and he expressed annoyance at the prospect of another child, I reminded him that I had previously mentioned being ovulating. To my shock, he admitted he didn’t actually comprehend what that meant. A grown man didn’t know the implications of my ovulation. I was speechless. His excuse? He thought I would manage everything related to conception.
Prepared for the Unexpected
Now, before anyone accuses us of being careless, let me clarify that while we don’t want a fifth child, we are prepared to support one if it happens. I’ve given away most of our baby items, and while I feel a twinge of baby fever when I see friends with newborns, I know we’re done expanding our family. Our kids are becoming more independent, and I enjoy the newfound freedom of having children who mostly ignore me unless they’re seeking extra screen time.
So, why do I still take the risk? Perhaps I truly wouldn’t mind having another cuddly baby, or maybe I’m just not thinking straight.
Further Reading
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Summary
Despite understanding human reproduction, I find myself facing pregnancy scares due to a mix of personal preferences and partner dynamics. My aversion to condoms and reluctance to return to hormonal birth control complicate matters, while my partner’s lack of knowledge about ovulation adds to the confusion. Ultimately, I’m left contemplating how much I might actually want another baby.