Over the past year, one of my sons has developed a concerning behavior. When he gets lost in his iPad, he starts nibbling and picking at his toes. It’s not just a casual habit; it’s what I refer to as “full gorging mode.” I won’t go into too much detail—let’s just say the aftermath isn’t pretty. His poor toes end up in quite a state.
Fortunately, this isn’t a daily issue, and it has lessened significantly recently. Still, I find myself worried and questioning what might be going on with him. I often wonder if I need to seek professional help and whether my approach—essentially pleading with him to stop—is the best way to handle it.
Insights from a Child Therapist
I spoke with Lisa Thompson, a child therapist and founder of the well-regarded website Anxious Kids. She explained that skin picking, often known as dermatillomania, is a common issue among children and adults alike. The clinical term for it is excoriation (skin picking) disorder, which is classified as an Obsessive-Compulsive and related disorder in the DSM-5.
Lisa reassured me that this disorder is both prevalent and treatable. When I inquired about how to recognize it in my child, she mentioned that the key symptom is a repeated pattern of skin picking that can lead to scabs or lesions. It’s crucial to ensure that these marks aren’t caused by another health issue.
Emotional Impact of Skin Picking
Beyond the physical signs, it’s essential to pay attention to how your child feels emotionally. Kids with skin picking disorder often feel compelled to continue the behavior, which can disrupt their daily lives. They may also experience feelings of embarrassment or distress about their actions and the resulting scars.
What Parents Can Do
So, what can parents do if they suspect their child has this issue? According to Lisa, it’s vital to consult a therapist who specializes in body-focused repetitive behaviors (BFRBs) for a proper assessment.
One surprising piece of advice from Lisa was about parental involvement. She noted that becoming the “picking police” isn’t effective and can sometimes worsen the behavior. It was enlightening to realize that when I urge my son to stop, it might actually make things worse.
Instead of constantly reminding him to quit, Lisa suggests that parents educate themselves and their children about what a picking disorder entails. Many kids feel isolated and ashamed, not realizing that this condition is common and manageable. This perspective has the potential to provide comfort to my son, helping him understand that he’s not alone and that support is available.
Empowerment Through Knowledge
Lisa herself has dealt with similar issues, both personally and with her daughter. She shared how she learned not to micromanage her daughter’s behavior, empowering her with knowledge about the disorder. Over time, her daughter developed the tools to manage her own habits, showing significant progress once the focus shifted to education and empowerment.
Resources for Further Support
If you’re looking for further resources, Lisa recommends Pickingme.org and the book What to Do When Bad Habits Take Hold by Dawn Huebner, both of which offer valuable insights.
With this newfound knowledge, I feel more equipped to handle my son’s toe-picking episodes. I plan to offer him Band-aids or socks to cover the areas he picks and a variety of fidget toys to keep his hands busy. Most importantly, I’ll validate his feelings and reassure him that he’s okay—that there’s nothing to feel ashamed about. I’ll also strive to stop nagging him and maintain the belief that this is a manageable problem.
Additional Insights
For additional insights, you can check out another one of our posts about similar challenges here. It’s important to recognize that there are many resources available to help families navigate these situations, and you can find excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination at March of Dimes and Intracervical Insemination.
Conclusion
In summary, it’s essential to approach your child’s skin picking behavior with understanding and support rather than criticism. By educating both yourself and your child, you can create a more compassionate environment that fosters healing and self-management.