When my partner was expecting our twins, we received our fair share of comments like, “I’ve always wanted twins!” and “Two for the price of one!” These remarks often came from people who didn’t have twins themselves, and who either lacked parenting experience or had forgotten the realities of raising children. The truth is, having two of any child—twins or otherwise—does not equate to a cost-effective parenting experience. Fortunately, we had friends who were parents of twins and they kept it real: “Twins are tough. Just focus on surviving the first year. Lower your expectations.” This candid advice resonated more than the cute notions of matching outfits.
We were already parents to a toddler when the ultrasound revealed we were expecting twins. Just like that, our plans changed. We had to sell our house and move across the street to accommodate our expanding family. Moving day coincided with the twins’ arrival from the hospital, and it’s been over eight years since then, yet we still have unpacked boxes in the basement. We prioritized adapting to life with twins over organizing our home.
The essentials for twins? Double everything. Cribs, car seats, bottles, diapers—you name it. While we had some items from our daughter, we quickly discovered that most things had to be replaced. My twins were small, so the gear we had didn’t fit them for quite some time. Thankfully, we were blessed with hand-me-downs and were willing to accept whatever was functional. The twins often ended up in accidental matching pajamas—our focus was on keeping them clean, not trendy.
Handling twins is like training for the Olympics. If you’ve never changed, bathed, or fed two babies simultaneously, you can’t fully grasp the intensity of the experience. Parenting one child is challenging, but managing twins pushed me to my limits. When both babies are teething, for instance, the chaos multiplies: sleepless nights, extra laundry, and clingy babies create a whirlwind of exhaustion. The same applies to self-feeding, walking, and potty training. Moments of joy do exist, but they come alongside the hard work and chaos.
My partner and I have been navigating the complexities of raising twins while also caring for their older sibling. Our twins may not have the perfect outfits or embody the idealized vision of twin life, but they are happy, loved, and well-fed. We even manage to get out of the house, which is essentially like orchestrating a three-ring circus.
As our twins have grown older, some things have become easier. Now that they’re eight, they’re more independent and can handle certain tasks on their own. However, challenges remain: duplicate paperwork at school, conflicting sports schedules, and the need for double the seasonal gear. We also strive to encourage their friendships while giving them space apart, which isn’t always simple.
Their boundless energy can sometimes feel like a natural disaster—my twins are best friends, and their combined enthusiasm can be overwhelming. Each day concludes with a flurry of activity as they prepare for bed, leaving a trail of chaos in their wake. Life with twins is not for the faint of heart.
Even though raising twins is loud and exhausting, it’s certainly not a “buy one, get one free” deal. Despite the challenges, we find happiness in our beautifully chaotic life together.
For more insights on pregnancy and parenting, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy.
Summary
Raising twins is an undeniably adorable experience, but it comes with a hefty dose of reality. From the chaos of needing double the essentials to the emotional challenges of supporting each child’s individuality, the journey is anything but glamorous. Yet, amidst the exhaustion, there are rewarding moments that make the hard work worthwhile.