Updated: April 18, 2023
Originally Published: April 18, 2023
Let’s get straight to the point: I miss you.
After two or even three decades of friendship, despite the miles between us, there are still moments when that longing hits me hard, almost tangible in its intensity. Some days, the ache of missing you feels like a heavy burden, as if I’ve just pushed through an intense workout—though I can’t claim to have ever attended a fitness class. Other times, a sudden wave of homesickness washes over me, catching me off guard and leaving me breathless.
Over time, we’ve learned to navigate this new landscape of our friendship—a reality that seems unchanging for the foreseeable future. Our main interactions now revolve around texts, emails, and the occasional phone call. I’ve mostly come to terms with this shift, but that doesn’t mean I don’t sometimes wish for more. I wish we were closer, saw each other more often, and had a little less on our plates. The truth is, I will always miss you.
I often reminisce about the simpler times, when hanging out meant just a quick walk down the hall or a call saying, “I’ve got some wine, I’m on my way!” I miss those long, unhurried conversations that meandered without a schedule. I miss our effortless silences and the way we borrowed each other’s clothes without a second thought. I miss our ritualistic viewings of shows like 90210 and Party of Five.
What I miss most is the authenticity we shared—being vulnerable and known. I long for the days when we dared to dream big, unhindered by the realities of adulthood. The feeling of being with you was like returning home.
Although we’ve established new friendships in our lives—whether with neighbors, coworkers, or other parents—these connections fill different voids. I appreciate these new relationships for the support they offer and the way they help alleviate loneliness, but they don’t replace you.
Life has been racing by, sometimes too fast to keep up. Between lessons, games, and countless responsibilities, it feels like years slip away in the blink of an eye. Yet, every time we do manage to reunite—whether for a brief lunch or an extended getaway—the world slows down, if only for a moment.
We might go long stretches without seeing each other, relying on digital exchanges to sustain our bond. But when we finally reconnect, it’s as if we’ve returned to that worn-out couch from our college days. Our conversations might now center on family updates rather than past escapades, but the essence of our friendship remains unaltered.
Beneath the nostalgia lies a robust foundation built on years of shared experiences. We can easily step back into those vacant spaces left by time apart, filling them with laughter and heartfelt conversations as if no time has passed.
Even as our lives diverge—whether we’re navigating parenthood in different ways or living in varied locales—the strength of our friendship overshadows any differences. The threads of our past are too strong to unravel.
So, we gather whenever possible, though it never feels like enough. We catch up on our lives, reflect on how much we’ve changed, and relive those cherished memories that make us laugh until tears stream down our faces. We tackle heavier conversations about life’s challenges with the comfort of true friendship.
And when we finally part ways, exchanging hugs and “I love yous,” we slip back into our daily routines with a promise to meet again. Until then, we send messages and share snippets of our lives online. Days fill up with obligations, but the longing remains—until we can reconnect, talk, and laugh as if no time has passed.
Until next time…
For more insights on starting a family, check out our post on artificial insemination. Additionally, family diversity is an important topic, and for further reading, visit this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary:
This heartfelt letter reflects on the deep bonds of friendship that endure through time and distance. It captures the nostalgia for past moments while embracing the present, acknowledging the need for connection amidst busy lives. The author expresses a longing for closeness and authenticity in friendships that, despite the physical separation, remain strong and meaningful.