As I sift through the photos on my phone, a particular image grabs my attention. My immediate response is one of disbelief. Who captured this unflattering shot of me? A wave of self-doubt crashes over me, threatening to bring tears to my eyes. Just as I’m about to delete it, my son walks into the room.
“Do you know anything about this picture?” I inquire, turning the screen towards him. A wide grin spreads across his face. “I took that while we were in Tahoe,” he replies. “You looked so beautiful just lying there. I couldn’t resist, Mom.”
“You really should ask before snapping pictures on my phone,” I remind him.
“I know,” he admits, “but seriously—look how pretty you are!”
I glance at the photo again, attempting to see it through his eyes. My daughter soon joins us, peering at the image. “That could be a postcard, Mom,” she smiles. “You’re so beautiful. I love it.”
Taking a deep breath, I realize this is precisely the reassurance I needed. My instinct tends to highlight every flaw. Yet, I’m beginning to recognize some beauty too.
Sure, I still see my dimply thighs, but I also see a mom resting on the shore after exploring the lake for hours with her children. I notice my chubby arms, yet I recognize them as the arms of a mother who helped her kids navigate rocky paths and scorching sand to spare their tender feet. I can’t ignore my weight, but I see an adventurous spirit, a mother who fiercely loves her children.
Like many women, I have battled with my weight for most of my life. This struggle isn’t going to vanish; I’ve never had a naturally slim build. Currently, I’m at my heaviest in a decade. But this time, I refuse to let my weight hold me back. I’m embracing tank tops, sundresses, and bathing suits in public. I’m playing with my kids this summer, and sometimes, I even feel attractive.
Yes, you read that right. “I feel pretty. Oh so pretty. I feel pretty, and witty and bright.” Well, maybe not exactly that. But something close!
Is this newfound confidence a result of aging? Perhaps it’s because I have bigger concerns than just my appearance. Or maybe it’s simply the way my children gaze at me with such love. In any case, I’ve made peace with my body. Admitting this is monumental for me, and it’s a realization that’s hard to grasp.
I’m not giving up on my journey toward health and fitness. I’ll continue to strive for improvement because I want to be around for my kids for many years to come. Right now, however, I want to appreciate my body as it is. I want to see myself through my children’s eyes. Thank you, my little ones.
For further insights on home insemination, be sure to check out this resource. And if you’re looking for authoritative information on breastfeeding, this site is incredibly helpful. Additionally, for comprehensive guidance on pregnancy, visit CDC’s pregnancy page.
Summary
This reflective piece highlights the journey of self-acceptance through the eyes of a mother. Despite struggles with body image and weight, she learns to see herself as her children do—through a lens of love and admiration. Embracing her body and the joys of motherhood, she aims to love herself where she is while continuing to pursue a healthier lifestyle.