Pam Carter, an attorney, and her husband, Mark Carter, a retired military veteran and postal worker, were eagerly anticipating the empty nest stage of their lives. With their youngest of five children set to graduate from high school, some of their older kids married, and the couple enjoying their new roles as grandparents, life seemed to be calming down. However, everything changed with a Facebook post.
The Carters began their fostering journey in 2013, initially with no plans to adopt. That was until Pam came across a heart-wrenching post about seven siblings, aged one to twelve, who had tragically lost both parents in a car accident. “Seeing that story about these kids needing a loving home struck a chord with us. We just knew we were meant to be their parents,” Pam recalled.
The children, who had miraculously survived the accident but suffered various injuries, had parents who both experienced foster care during their childhood. Following the accident, these seven siblings had been moved from their hometown to a homeless tent shelter before being placed in temporary housing in San Diego.
In March 2019, Pam and Mark met the children, which progressed to weekly visits and then overnight stays at their home. By June 7, 2019, the seven kids officially joined the Carter family. However, the adoption process faced additional challenges due to the pandemic, which forced local courts to shut down just four days before their scheduled adoption finalization.
Fortunately, they were able to finalize the adoptions months later, on August 7, 2020, via Zoom. Mark retired in 2020 as well, while the couple’s youngest biological daughter graduated high school. Pam continues to work, while a nanny assists Mark, who has taken on the role of a full-time dad, with the children.
A Day in the Life of the Carter Household
So, what does a typical day look like in the Carter household? Pam explains that their routine includes meals, schoolwork, and plenty of outdoor activities. The kids stay active with skating, trampoline jumping, swimming, and biking. Family weekends are filled with visits to the park or beach, spending time with their new siblings and their children.
The siblings, now aged fifteen, thirteen, nine, eight, seven, five, and four, have brought immense joy to Pam as she witnesses their new experiences—like visiting Disneyland, horseback riding, and beach outings. Despite the challenges they face, Pam notes how the children are flourishing, feeling more secure after years of instability.
Navigating Trauma and Challenges
However, navigating trauma remains a significant challenge for any foster parent. Pam emphasizes, “Childhood trauma affects each child differently.” Many of these children come from backgrounds involving drug addiction, violence, and neglect. Fortunately, the Carters’ extensive experience in foster care equipped them to support their new family members effectively.
The COVID-19 pandemic has added another layer of complexity, as school formats transitioned from virtual to in-person, disrupting routines. The kids miss participating in sports and arts programs, but the extra time at home has fostered stronger bonds among siblings and parents, as well as opportunities for learning new skills like bike riding.
The Importance of Fostering
In the U.S., there are approximately 400,000 children in foster care, with 120,000 awaiting adoption into loving families. Sadly, around 200,000 youth age out of the system annually without a family to support them. Pam encourages anyone interested in fostering to explore available orientations and training in their area, emphasizing that the transformations they witness in children are incredibly rewarding. “We’ve seen it happen time and again, regardless of the child’s age. It’s an honor to watch them grow into secure and loved individuals!”
For further insights on fostering and parenting, check out this informative resource for pregnancy and home insemination, and you can also learn more about childhood challenges related to trauma here.
Search Queries
- foster care resources
- how to adopt
- parenting tips for foster families
- overcoming childhood trauma
- support for adoptive parents
Conclusion
In summary, the Carters embraced an unexpected journey into parenthood by adopting seven siblings, transforming their lives from preparing for an empty nest to a bustling family filled with joy and challenges. Their experiences highlight the importance of love and support for children in foster care, showcasing the profound impact that a nurturing home can have on their lives.