If you’ve ever dined at a seafood restaurant, you might have had the chance to pick your own lobster from a tank, just like they do on TV! But here’s the catch — not all lobsters are equal. Usually, they’re sold by weight, so choosing a hefty one can lead to a pricey meal, while a smaller one might leave you hungry shortly after. At least if you went with the tiny option, your wallet stayed a bit fuller (and if you were at Red Lobster, you could fill up on those delicious cheddar biscuits). If you’ve had one of those lobster dinner mishaps, you probably didn’t find it amusing at the time. But fear not! We’re here to turn that frown upside down with some fun lobster puns and jokes.
Lobster puns and jokes are a real treat for fans of these fascinating crustaceans. Let’s give a nod to those grocery store lobster tanks for helping improve their reputation! Though, to be honest, encountering one at the beach does give us the creeps — blame it on their claws and the fact that they urinate from their faces. Yes, you read that right! It could almost be a punchline itself.
So, here are some lobster puns and jokes to share at your next lobster feast:
Lobster Puns:
- Lobsters prefer their morning clawfee piping hot.
- When answering the phone, a lobster says, “Shello?”
- Lobsters love holidays because it’s ’tis the sea-son.
- One lobster cried when his teacher called him a lost claws.
- The lobster was struggling in school because of algae-bra.
- A lobster left home due to pier pressure.
- A lady lobster sports seashells since she’s outgrown her B-shells.
- The lobster asked its catfish buddy, “Who’s your cod-father?”
- Someone drove around Portland looking for lobster and was disappointed — lobster is meant to be a Maine attraction!
- The lobster lost its wealth because it was shelling out cash.
- Lobsters don’t make great friends; they’re way too shellfish.
- A lobster reported a crime, but the cops needed him to be more Pacific.
- When a lobster was considering proposing, his buddy asked if he was shore about it.
- At a lobster wedding, the groom called his partner his “butter half.”
- One lobster mentioned diving into boiling water, and everyone thought he was cray-sea.
- At a farewell party, a lobster praised his colleague, saying he was one shell of a guy.
- The lobster found it tough to retire since he was tide to his job.
- Late for work every day, she lobster her job.
- After snapping at a friend, the lobster apologized, claiming he was just salty.
- The lobster playing tennis was a true lob-star.
- A lobster’s signature shot is the lob.
- If you cross a lobster with a telephone, you get snappy talk.
- Expecting a call, the lobster crabbed the phone.
- The ocean waved at the lobster without saying a word.
- The lobster blushed because of the sea weed.
Lobster Jokes:
- I dined at Mary Poppins’ Restaurant last night… the super cauliflower cheese was great, but the lobster was terrible.
- Why are lobsters poor at sharing? Because they’re shellfish!
- What do you call a lobster that’s claustrophobic? Claws-trophobic!
- What do you call a tired and overworked lobster? A frustracean.
- I asked a waiter at a seafood restaurant how they prepared the lobster. He grew silent and said, “We just tell him the truth, man. ‘This is the end of the line.’”
- A man saw a sign saying “Lobster Tails, $5” and thought it was a steal. He paid but instead got a story: “Once upon a time, there was this lobster…”
- Did you hear about the fight at Red Lobster? Four fish were battered!
- Who brings gifts to good lobsters on Christmas? Santa Claws.
- How much salt do lobsters use when cooking pasta? Just a pinch.
- At the bread factory, where do lobsters work? At the crust station.
- One lobster took another out on a date, and he said, “I’ll pay for dinner, it’s be-claws I love you.”
- How do lobsters travel around the beach? By shell-i-copter.
- What do you call a famous lobster? A shellebrity.
- Where do crabs and lobsters park their vehicles? At the bustacean.
- Why did the lobster visit the physical therapist? It pulled a mussel.
- A man ordered lobster for dinner, but when it arrived with one claw, he complained. The waiter said it was in a fight. “Well, bring me the winner!” replied the man.
- Why couldn’t the lady eat shrimp, lobsters, and clams cooked with steam? She has shellfish steam issues.
- What do you call a crab that throws things? A lobster!
- Where does a lobster keep its clothes? In the clawset.
- Why was the ocean screaming? You would too if you had lobsters on your bottom!
- Did you hear about the lobster that rode a sea mammal into battle? He did it on porpoise.
- Where are there no hipster lobsters? In the Maine stream.
- Where do lobsters go to borrow money? To the prawn brokers.
- What’s the perfect name for a pet lobster? Clawde.
- Did you hear about the big brawl between the blue lobsters and the red ones? Other lobsters claimed it was like a sea-n from a movie.
- What’s worse than lobsters on your piano? Crabs on your organ.
- Where do lobsters wait for the bus? At the bustacean.
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In summary, if you’re looking for a good laugh while dining on lobster, these puns and jokes are sure to deliver! From clever wordplay to hilarious scenarios, they will add a splash of fun to your next seafood feast.