Being a mother to three black boys is no simple task. While I see my children as just like any other kids, I remain acutely aware of the societal challenges they face. There are individuals who will form judgments about them without ever understanding who they are.
My boys are kind-hearted, respectful, and loving, qualities that inspire me daily. It pains me to know that I must teach them lessons that many parents don’t have to contemplate. The reality is that there are people filled with hate who do not respect others based on the color of their skin. Although our society has made strides since the past, there are still remnants of prejudice that linger. My husband and I find it necessary to go above and beyond in our parenting approach.
While there are countless lessons that could be imparted, three stand out as particularly critical for my boys:
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You Are Uniquely Made
We emphasize the importance of recognizing what God says about them. It’s vital for them to understand their inherent worth and to appreciate the unique traits that make them special. We often gather around the dinner table to encourage them to identify their strengths and celebrate their individuality. Building their self-esteem is crucial; we know there will come times when they may doubt their value due to external perceptions. My upbringing in a loving household taught me the significance of a strong sense of self-worth, and I want the same for my children. Unfortunately, not everyone has the support I did, which is why I strive to instill confidence in my boys so they can face the world knowing their true worth. -
Prioritize Faith Over Fear
As a mother, fear can be paralyzing, especially considering the racial injustices that persist today. I’ve heard too many stories of people facing discrimination and even violence because of their skin color, and I know how these experiences can shape one’s outlook. We don’t teach our children to view law enforcement as adversaries; instead, we explain that prejudice exists in all sectors of society. Our goal is to help them navigate these realities while maintaining emotional resilience. It’s essential for them to understand that, while fear is a natural response, faith is far more empowering. We encourage them to lean on God and trust that they are protected and guided. By fostering open family discussions about their fears and experiences, we help them cultivate a hopeful outlook. -
You Can Achieve Anything
In a world that often imposes limiting beliefs about the paths available to them—such as becoming athletes or entertainers—we encourage our sons to pursue their dreams without constraints. We expose them to diverse experiences that ignite their imaginations and broaden their horizons. While they may face challenges and be required to work harder to overcome stereotypes, we want them to understand that perseverance and dedication can lead to success. We’re committed to nurturing their confidence so they can become the remarkable individuals God intended them to be.
As a parent, I hold onto the faith that society will continue to progress and that my sons will encounter individuals who recognize their potential. I believe wholeheartedly that they will accomplish great things.
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In summary, the lessons we teach our sons are rooted in self-worth, faith, and limitless potential. These principles are essential as they navigate a world that can be both beautiful and challenging.
