Over a decade ago, I experienced my second miscarriage, an event that shaped my understanding of grief. While the intensity of that sorrow has faded with time, it remains ever-present. Miscarriage is a profound loss, and the feelings surrounding it can vary greatly from person to person, and even from one loss to another.
My journey included three distinct miscarriages. The first, an early loss often referred to as a chemical pregnancy, left me feeling confused and surreal, as I had not yet fully processed the reality of my pregnancy. The second, however, was a much more challenging experience. It involved numerous doctor appointments, a hopeful anticipation that everything would turn out fine, and ultimately, a D&C procedure warned to prevent severe complications. The aftermath of that loss was heavy; I grieved in silence, finding solace in long walks with my children and losing myself in self-help literature.
The societal expectation to “just move on” after a miscarriage only deepens the pain. This is why New Zealand’s recent legislation regarding miscarriage bereavement leave is so crucial—not only for the financial relief it provides families but also for the acknowledgment of the emotional toll that follows such a loss.
According to Ginny Anderson, the politician behind the bill, it allows parents to grieve without having to use sick leave. “Their grief is not an illness; it is a loss. And loss requires time,” she expressed in a statement to TVNZ. This sentiment underscores the importance of recognizing the profound impact of miscarriage.
I hope this law serves as a catalyst for broader acceptance and understanding regarding miscarriage, not just in New Zealand but also in other countries, such as the U.S. Mental health professionals agree on the significance of this recognition. Julia Bueno, a psychotherapist, emphasized that this law represents both a real and symbolic acknowledgment of the grief associated with miscarriage.
While we have made strides in breaking the silence surrounding miscarriage, stigma still exists, particularly in professional environments. I have openly discussed my experiences online, yet I hesitated to share this article on LinkedIn out of fear of revealing my losses. This hesitation is a reflection of the stigma that persists, and it highlights the necessity for laws that enable women to be authentic in all aspects of their lives, including their careers.
Women often carry this burden in silence, striving to maintain professionalism while grappling with grief. However, a truly successful workplace is one where employees can bring their whole selves, including their emotional experiences, allowing them to perform at their best.
New Zealand’s miscarriage bereavement law has significant implications. Beyond its economic benefits, it sends a powerful message to women and families: “We see your pain. You are valued as a complete individual.” This recognition is not only impactful but essential.
For more insights on related topics, check out this other blog post and visit intracervicalinsemination.com for authoritative information. For a comprehensive resource on pregnancy and home insemination, visit WebMD.
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- Miscarriage support resources
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Summary
New Zealand’s miscarriage bereavement law is a much-needed acknowledgment of the emotional pain associated with pregnancy loss. It allows parents the time to grieve without having to compromise their sick leave. This legislation not only provides financial relief but also promotes a more compassionate understanding of the profound impact of miscarriage, encouraging workplaces to embrace full authenticity for their employees.