Let’s dive into my experience as an older mom. My career as a journalist kept me busy, and I wasn’t ready for the demands of parenthood. However, at 40, I had a revelation: “It’s now or never.” Remarkably, just five months later, I embraced motherhood.
The Good
I have a strong sense of self.
Having my child later allowed me to be more confident in my identity. Unlike in my 20s and 30s, I wasn’t navigating my own growth while trying to raise a child.
I have more time and patience.
While I’m not the perfect mom, I now have more time to invest in making meaningful efforts and to read about parenting techniques. My deadline-driven days as a reporter were replaced with a more patient approach to motherhood.
I can afford to take time off.
Thanks to my husband’s job, I had the financial flexibility to take time off after our baby’s arrival. With two decades of work experience, I felt secure that I could find employment again later.
I can hire help.
We brought on a wonderful nanny, Mia, who was extremely devoted to our daughter. I learned early on from a friend, Sarah, not to feel guilty about delegating tasks. Instead of exhausting myself trying to do everything, I focused on the activities I truly enjoyed, like bath time and reading stories. This made me a happier, more engaged mom.
I’m relaxed and more fun.
As older parents, my husband and I are less concerned with strict rules. We often allow spontaneous visits and don’t stress about missed bedtimes. I find that I’m more willing to embrace silliness, whether it’s dancing with my daughter or participating in her TikTok videos.
The Bad
I feel my age.
I find that I need to stretch more frequently, and fatigue sets in faster. Sometimes, I wish for a quiet flight alone—just me, a glass of wine, and a movie.
I’m older than many other parents.
While I have confidence, I still struggle with being older than my peers. On my 50th birthday, I was at a school event when someone asked if it was a special birthday. I panicked and denied it, even though I knew there was nothing particularly special about turning 50.
I’m not tech-savvy.
There’s a generational gap when it comes to technology. I don’t quite understand my daughter’s online interests, like Instagram or Roblox, and I sometimes wish I could engage more with her digital life.
I worry that my age is noticeable.
At the doctor’s office, a nurse once asked my daughter who I was, and I couldn’t help but think it was because of my age. During a family trip to a water park, I realized that the adults around me were all grandparents, while I was still a mom, and their surprised reactions made me feel self-conscious.
In conclusion, I don’t regret being an older mom. I feel incredibly fortunate to have this experience.
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