I can vividly recall my graduation day, as if it were just yesterday. We were all clad in our gowns, snapping pictures, and joyfully tossing our caps into the air. Green Day’s “Time of Your Life” played in the background while a slideshow of our unforgettable four years rolled on. There were tears, hugs, and promises that we would “stay connected” and that nothing would ever change between us.
“Friends are forever!” we declared. “We will never drift apart!” With pink friendship bracelets wrapped around our wrists, we swore our commitment to each other.
Fast forward fifteen years, and it’s no surprise that so much has transformed. I no longer have all the same friends from high school. That faded pink bracelet is now tucked away in a trunk, resting alongside countless photos and letters from the early 2000s.
Thanks to social media, we can keep in touch, but mostly, we’ve moved on with our lives. I cherish those incredible women, but we’ve simply drifted. It’s not tragic; it’s just life.
Having lived long enough to earn a few gray hairs, I’ve come to realize that you can count on one hand the number of friends who stand by you through life’s pivotal changes. Friends often fade away after college, and when marriage comes, even more slip through the cracks. And we all know how having children can alter relationships.
This natural drifting apart is part of life. People evolve, and as we do, relationships often shift until only a few remain. The cherished few who endure become your inner circle — friends who remain by your side, even when maintaining that friendship becomes challenging. These connections are priceless and demand effort to sustain.
However, there exists a special kind of friend who is even more valuable than your inner circle. This friendship thrives not through struggle, but through its effortless nature.
She is your person.
Your bond is as comfortable as your favorite pair of worn-in jeans or a cozy breakfast for dinner. You can chat for hours daily without growing weary of each other, or you can go a year without talking, and when you reconnect, it feels like no time has passed. Life changes don’t shake this friendship.
Getting married? Great! You can skip sending a wedding invite because your person already knows the venue by heart and wouldn’t miss it for the world. She was there when you chose your flowers, teared up when you found “the dress,” and danced like a star at the reception, appearing in more than half your wedding photos as a constant presence.
Welcoming a baby? Awesome! She may not have kids yet, but you can bet she’s Googling “Braxton Hicks” to understand your pregnancy woes. She’ll gladly drop off cravings like pickles and ice cream, and she’s already chosen her “Auntie” name.
Because she genuinely cares. Your person wants your happiness just as much as her own.
When a crisis hits, she’s your first call. She swoops in like a superhero, takes your hand, and effortlessly brings you comfort.
If, heaven forbid, divorce strikes, your person will be there to dry your tears, honor your past love, and even have a gallon of sugar in her trunk “just in case” she needs to handle that ex.
If there’s a death in your family, your person will jump on a plane at a moment’s notice, and when you lock eyes, a flood of unspoken words will pass between you. You’ll just cry and let her hold you, because she’s precisely who you needed.
There’s immense comfort in knowing that someone who just “gets it” is right there with you.
With your person, you don’t need to plan anything. You don’t have to tidy your home or your life. She’s there for all of it, without judgment or hesitation.
She’ll lounge on the couch with you in pajamas, binge-watching your favorite show, even if she’s a couple of seasons behind. She’s happy to roam around Target with you for hours, sipping lattes and trying on bargain-rack rompers that are best left on the rack.
Your person doesn’t need entertainment; she only wants to be with you.
Who needs plans anyway when you can stay up till dawn with your person, reminiscing about the past over junk food and laughing until you leak? It’s the best feeling ever.
Maybe you met her in kindergarten, or perhaps she was at your graduation. Maybe your paths crossed later in life, or maybe you haven’t met her yet. One thing is certain: when you do, you’ll know.
And when that day comes when life is overwhelming and your spouse is driving you crazy, you’ll pick up the phone, just like countless times before, and call your person.
You’ll laugh, cry, and dream about purchasing side-by-side homes in a cozy beach town. You’ll discuss retirement adventures and how your husbands will just have to get along. You’ll even talk about ending up in a nursing home together, gray-haired and fabulous, playing bunco and causing all sorts of mischief — just like you already do. You both know without a doubt that you’ll be there for each other, come what may, for eternity.
Because there’s one exceptionally rare type of friend that you get to keep forever, and that’s your person.
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In summary, the true treasure in life is finding that special friend who remains steadfast through every change, supporting you without reservation. Whether you’ve known her forever or are yet to meet, when she enters your life, it will feel effortless and genuine.