This January marks the 45th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, a pivotal Supreme Court decision that legalized abortion across the United States. Even before this landmark ruling in 1973, abortion was a divisive issue. However, few anticipated the intense backlash that would follow from opponents. Today, abortion continues to be one of the most fervently debated topics in American politics, despite the fact that 1 in 4 women will undergo the procedure in their lifetime. I am one of those women.
In December 2012, I married a man named Jake, whom I had been dating for several years. From the outset, I harbored doubts about our future together due to his abusive behavior and volatility. I knew that starting a family with him was not an option, yet the complexity of leaving an abuser—financially and socially intertwined—made the decision daunting. Eventually, I went through with the marriage.
Shortly after our wedding, I started feeling unwell, prompting me to search for symptoms online. To my surprise, every search result pointed to pregnancy. Despite being on birth control, I resisted the notion and rummaged through our bathroom for an old pregnancy test, which confirmed my fears: I was pregnant.
In that moment, I recognized the necessity of terminating the pregnancy. The idea of raising a child with Jake was unimaginable, and financially, we were unprepared. Though I had a good job with decent health benefits, I hadn’t been employed long enough to qualify for maternity leave. Our budget had no room for daycare, and we lacked family support. Without hesitation, I contacted the abortion clinic.
The procedure was straightforward and without pain. Afterward, I returned home with a sense of relief and gratitude rather than regret. I felt fortunate to have access to high-quality abortion services and insurance that covered the procedure. However, I am acutely aware that many individuals seeking abortion care do not share my experience.
Since the enactment of Roe v. Wade, lawmakers have instituted over 1,140 unique restrictions on abortion, with more than 30% enacted in the last eight years. These laws range from requiring parental consent to imposing waiting periods and, in some states, banning abortion even in cases of rape or incest. Such restrictions have led to clinic closures and made access to necessary care increasingly difficult, particularly for women of color. In extreme cases, individuals have resorted to unsafe DIY methods for abortion.
In Ohio, where I reside, advocates for abortion rights are tirelessly battling against a slew of restrictions. Since 2010, the number of clinics has decreased by nearly 50%, leaving vast areas without any providers. With a 24-hour waiting period in place, Ohio has also introduced bans on abortions after 20 weeks and restrictions related to Down Syndrome diagnoses, among others. Every new restriction feels like a personal affront to my choices and my family.
In the months following my abortion, my marriage deteriorated as expected, and I was able to leave approximately a year later. Thankfully, without children or property to divide, I navigated the divorce process without legal representation. I quickly regained my footing, securing a fulfilling job, purchasing a home, and remarrying. Five months ago, I welcomed my first child. Motherhood has its challenges, but it has been a rewarding experience that unfolded on my terms. I cherish my son and feel immense gratitude for the choice I made to have an abortion; without it, he would not be here.
I often reflect on what my life might have looked like had I been forced to carry that pregnancy to term. My career would have stagnated, I might still be in an abusive relationship, and I would be raising a child in an unstable environment. The repercussions would have been dire. If I had lived in a different state, such as Kentucky or Texas, or lacked supportive health insurance, I may not have had the option to choose. The quick visit to the clinic could have turned into a long, expensive journey, making the situation even more challenging. I feel fortunate to have escaped those difficult choices, and I believe everyone deserves the same freedom.
For 45 years, women like myself have relied on the right to determine if, when, and how to become parents. It is crucial that we protect Roe v. Wade for future generations and work to eliminate laws that infringe upon this right. For those exploring options for parenthood, there are resources available, including an excellent overview at Women’s Health and insights from Pumping Breast Milk for Twin Babies on managing motherhood. Additionally, for those considering home insemination, check out this guide on at-home insemination kits.
Summary:
The personal narrative shares the author’s journey from facing an unexpected pregnancy in an abusive marriage to making the decision to have an abortion. It highlights the relief and gratitude she felt following the procedure and the importance of access to abortion care. The piece also discusses the ongoing restrictions surrounding abortion rights and the personal implications these laws have on women’s lives. Ultimately, it emphasizes the significance of choice in motherhood and the need to protect reproductive rights.