Since the onset of the pandemic nearly a year ago, I’ve witnessed unexpected changes in my teenagers—sides of them I never knew existed. My daughter began self-harming last winter. As the days grew shorter, she seemed to be overwhelmed by life, despite having fewer responsibilities. When I asked her if she felt lonely, she insisted she didn’t think so. She enjoys being home due to her social anxiety and has actually excelled in her studies since switching to online learning, attributing her success to the absence of social pressures. Yet, underneath this seemingly positive shift, she was truly battling her own demons.
My son nearly backed over me in the driveway last summer when I told him he couldn’t leave the house. He started his car, undeterred by my warning to stay inside. Knowing him well enough to realize he might leave anyway, I stood behind his vehicle. He inched closer, expecting me to move, but I refused to budge. Eventually, I sat down behind the car to work, reminding him who set the rules. His frustration has manifested in anger, causing him to lash out at himself. He is desperate to escape our home, and when he expresses this feeling, it’s visceral—I can feel his anguish.
Watching my children struggle through these emotions has been incredibly difficult. Like many parents, I am grappling with my own feelings in this chaos, making it even harder to support them. The pandemic has undeniably taken a toll on our teenagers. This is a critical time in their lives when they typically seek independence and cultivate social circles. Navigating this crisis has only intensified the challenges of adolescence.
Hearing about a local high school senior who took his life last fall due to profound loneliness deeply affected us. According to a June survey by the Centers for Disease Control, 26% of young adults aged 18-24 reported having suicidal thoughts in the past month. Additionally, emergency room visits related to mental health issues increased by 30% in 2020 compared to the previous year.
Reports from the Washington Post indicate that Teen Line, a helpline for youth, has seen a surge in calls during the pandemic. Many teens are wrestling with their relationships, experiencing thoughts of self-harm, or enduring abusive home environments without the usual support systems from school or friends.
Given that neither parents nor teens have faced such challenges before, identifying how to help can be daunting—especially for those children who are not open about their feelings. Healthy Children suggests watching for signs like shifts in eating and sleeping habits, reluctance to video chat, or a decline in interest in schoolwork and personal hygiene. If you notice these warning signs, it’s crucial to engage them in conversation. Ask how they’re feeling and if they’re experiencing increased depression or thoughts of self-harm.
Involving a family doctor early on is essential if you have concerns. They can conduct screenings for depression and suicidal ideation. Some teens, like my daughter, initially appeared to cope well with the pandemic but later faced challenges. Through open discussions, close monitoring, and enrolling her in online counseling, she has returned to her previous self. I believe she was unaware of her feelings of isolation, despite her insistence otherwise. Seeking help was vital for both of us.
Edutopia notes that some students, particularly those who are shy, hyperactive, or highly creative, have thrived in remote learning environments. The flexibility to progress at their own pace and reduced social pressures have contributed to their success. However, we must not overlook the mental health struggles many teenagers face.
Engaging with your children, observing their daily habits, and seeking professional assistance if necessary can equip them with coping skills that will benefit them for a lifetime.
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In summary, the pandemic has profoundly affected our teenagers, leading to increased mental health challenges. Parents must remain vigilant, proactive in communication, and seek professional help when necessary to ensure the well-being of their children.