When life is filled with distractions, every moment feels crucial. It seems imperative to check off tasks, scroll through screens, or dash off to the next obligation. Despite your best efforts at multitasking, there never seems to be enough time in the day. This was my reality for two chaotic years, where notifications, ringtones, and a packed schedule dictated my every move. I was determined to make it to each event on my over-scheduled agenda, yet I often found myself falling short.
Six years ago, I was gifted with a wonderfully relaxed child who thrived on enjoying the moment. When I needed to leave, she was still contemplating which purse or sparkly crown to wear. When I was already late, she insisted on buckling her stuffed animal into the car seat. Even simple errands turned into lengthy adventures as she paused to chat with anyone who resembled an elder. My type A personality struggled to appreciate her carefree spirit. Instead, I often thought, “We don’t have time for this,” and my most frequent command became “Hurry up.”
I started my mornings with it, “Hurry up and eat your breakfast.” I ended my evenings with it, “Hurry up and get to bed.” Regrettably, these words didn’t speed her up but they were uttered far more than “I love you.” The realization hit me hard; I was pushing my child to conform to my frantic pace, often at the expense of her joy.
One day, after picking up my older daughter from school, she turned to her younger sister and exclaimed, “You are so slow!” In that moment, I recognized myself in her frustration. I realized that I had been a bully, pressuring my child into a hurried existence while she simply wanted to savor life.
With a shaky voice, I apologized to my younger daughter. “I’m so sorry for making you hurry. I admire how you take your time, and I want to learn from you.” Her surprise was evident, but a radiant smile broke across her face, illuminating the moment. I vowed to practice more patience, though that would be easier said than done.
To facilitate this shift, I began allowing extra time for her to prepare. Even when we were late, I reassured myself that this phase of her childhood would soon pass. While taking walks or running errands, I let her dictate the pace. I began to notice the world through her eyes—her delight in small wonders, the way she noticed bugs, flowers, and the beauty around her. She was a Noticer, and I soon learned that such children are invaluable.
This commitment to slow down started nearly three years ago, coinciding with my journey to eliminate distractions and focus on what truly matters. Living at a more deliberate pace is still a challenge, yet my daughter serves as a constant reminder of its importance. Just recently, while on vacation, we visited a sno-cone shack. As she eagerly admired her treat, a worried expression crossed her face. “Do I have to rush, Mama?”
My heart sank; the scars of my hurried past lingered. But as she looked up at me, seeking reassurance, I realized I had a choice. I could lament my previous mistakes or embrace the present. “You don’t have to rush. Just take your time,” I gently replied. Her face lit up, and we spent that moment enjoying each other’s company, sharing smiles and savoring the world around us.
As she finished her sno-cone, she offered me the last bite. “I saved this for you, Mama,” she said proudly. In that simple act, she reminded me that life is sweeter when we embrace each moment rather than rush through it.
Whether it’s enjoying a frozen treat, noticing flowers, or simply taking a stroll, I refuse to say, “We don’t have time for this.” That would mean missing out on the beauty of living. Taking time to appreciate the little joys is the only way to truly embrace life.
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In summary, my journey to stop rushing my children has transformed our relationship. By embracing patience and allowing them to enjoy life’s small pleasures, I have discovered deeper connections and a renewed appreciation for the world around us.