Updated: Jan. 22, 2021
Originally Published: April 22, 2018
In my life, it often feels like there’s too much month left after my money runs out. This isn’t due to a lack of hard work; as a single parent and a full-time freelance writer, I’m grateful to pursue what I love while being at home with my son. However, the reality is that childcare costs are prohibitive, and even with him enrolled in a half-day program, I find it challenging to balance my professional obligations with parenting. As summer approaches, the prospect of finding an affordable summer camp seems daunting.
Childcare expenses can dominate a parent’s budget. If I were employed in a traditional role that required me to pay for childcare, my entire paycheck would likely go towards it. This situation is particularly dire for low-income families, who often find themselves compelled to work just to afford someone else to care for their children. If we didn’t work, we could end up homeless.
Each month, I find myself calculating, “How much do I need to write to cover the rent?” This number typically remains constant, though it can fluctuate based on my output. To keep things stable, I aim to have at least 75% of the rent paid by the 15th of the month. For low-income families, securing housing is always the top priority. With the increasing influx of people into lower-income neighborhoods due to gentrification, housing costs continue to rise, and landlords are less lenient than in the past. Late rent payments often result in fees or eviction notices, adding to the stress.
Someone once suggested that it’s wise to save at least one month’s rent for emergencies. While this sounds practical, families like mine, who live paycheck to paycheck, find this nearly impossible. Just one missed workday can jeopardize our ability to pay rent or keep the lights on.
This struggle makes it difficult to keep a sick child at home. Many parents can’t afford to miss work, even when their kids have minor ailments. Companies often limit the number of sick or vacation days, so staying home with a sick child puts employment—and consequently housing and food security—at risk. Backup childcare isn’t always available and rarely comes without a cost. Friends or family might not be able to step in at a moment’s notice, which can put additional strain on working parents. A friend of mine recently faced job loss due to childcare issues, a reality that many endure.
Then there’s the guilt that accompanies our financial choices. I often find myself bargain shopping, a skill I learned from growing up in similar circumstances. I want to provide my son with nice clothing, but I primarily shop at retailers like Target, waiting for sales to dress him for the season. Fortunately, living in Southern California allows me to stretch clothes for longer wear. When he outgrows jeans, I resort to cuffing them, and I was relieved to find a jacket at half price, even if I had to brave a rainstorm to get it.
Making ends meet is a constant challenge. I often marvel at how I manage to cover all the bills month after month. Sometimes, I delay certain payments, knowing I can hold out a few extra days. My credit score has suffered as a result, and I conserve energy by limiting light usage and cutting back on heating whenever possible. I only turn on the lights once dusk falls, teaching my son the importance of saving, while we bundle up to avoid high gas bills during colder nights.
Without SNAP benefits, I would be in dire straits. Contrary to popular belief, families utilizing these resources are not exploiting the system; we are hard-working individuals who contribute to and rely on the support structures in place. To qualify for these benefits, one must demonstrate employment or actively seek work.
Being a low-income parent means money is never taken for granted. Having an extra ten dollars to treat my son to fast food feels like a luxury. The ability to take an Uber instead of waiting for a delayed bus is a small blessing. Occasionally, I splurge on new clothes for myself, even though most of my wardrobe is older than my child. I also strive to buy my son new toys, recognizing how much joy they bring him.
As my son grows, I anticipate more challenges. He’ll want to participate in activities, sports, and adventures that may be financially out of reach. While I wish to provide for him, I know that these conversations about “not now” or “maybe next year” will become more frequent. The harsh reality is that the financial burden of parenting is unlikely to ease anytime soon.
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Summary
Navigating the challenges of parenting while on a tight budget is a reality many face. From the high costs of childcare to the struggle of making ends meet, low-income families often prioritize housing and basic needs above all else. The guilt of financial limitations weighs heavily, especially when wanting to provide more for our children. As they grow, the desire to enrich their lives with activities and experiences often collides with budget constraints, making it clear that the path ahead will require careful planning and sacrifice.