Just a short while ago, my daughter was still sleeping in her crib.
Oh, I see some curious faces out there. You, in the stylish outfit, want to know: How old is she? shifts nervously She’s… um… three and a half. What? You need me to speak up? Well, she’s almost four, alright?! Yes, my little one was still in a crib at three and a half, and I’m well aware of the judgment that comes with it.
Honestly, it felt like a miracle that we managed to keep her in there. Please, don’t report us! Ironically, despite her adventurous spirit—flinging herself off play structures and performing stunts off the couch—she never once attempted to climb out of her crib. With no older sibling to show her the way, she seemed oblivious to the existence of a ‘big kid bed.’ So, we kept her in the crib, and it was a conscious decision; we wanted to hold on to this phase a little longer.
Our friends, frazzled from their own parenting experiences, warned us against this transition. They painted a grim picture: “Don’t do it! It’s a nightmare!” They shared tales of their own children attempting great escapes, with one family even considering installing a reverse lock on their doorknob. “Just keep her in that baby jail forever!” they urged.
There was an undeniable sense of security that came with her crib. We always knew where she would be at night. Our routine was simple: bath time, teeth brushing, a bedtime story, and then into the crib by 8 p.m. Twelve hours later, we’d see her on the monitor, happily reading to her stuffed animals. It was a blissful cycle.
Then came the weekend we were away. The only available sleeping arrangement for her was a regular bed. Upon our return, she announced, with a surprising maturity (and a hint of manipulation), that she was ready for a big kid bed. We believed her. What fools we were.
Initially, everything seemed fine. She was excited about the change and behaved just as she had in her crib. But that comforting feeling of knowing she was safely contained? Gone in an instant. Suddenly, my mind was flooded with terrifying thoughts of her sneaking out at night, wandering into her brother’s room, or worse, tumbling down the stairs (she had already cracked the baby gate code long before she knew what a big kid bed was).
I was never a heavy sleeper, but I quickly lost the ability to sleep soundly. As soon as she realized she could leave her bed, it was game over. The once-easy nights turned chaotic. The baby now wakes once or twice a night, while my daughter turned into a nocturnal creature who rose at dawn.
Every time we tucked her in, she reappeared before us, citing various “urgent” needs: another hug, a drink of water, or a strange noise. What should have been precious time for my husband and me became a two-hour workout as we took turns running up and down the stairs to return her to bed.
Finally, once the house was quiet and everyone else was asleep, I attempted to rest, only to be jolted awake by her face inches away from mine, breathing heavily. The sheer shock of awakening to her whispering “Mom” in the dark was enough to send my heart racing, leaving me wide awake for hours.
This cycle repeated itself, sometimes up to five times a night. And, of course, she would rise with the sun, often rousing the baby in the process. We tried everything: begging, bribing, reasoning, even a special alarm clock that worked for two mornings before she realized it wouldn’t punish her for ignoring it.
In our most desperate moments, we’ve entertained the thought of putting her back in a crib and regretting our decision to let her transition. Wouldn’t it be perfectly normal and acceptable to keep her in there until college? At this point, I’m too fatigued to dwell on that.
So here I am, your frazzled friend with a cup of coffee, urging you: Unless your child is attempting to leap over the crib rails in a bid for freedom, keep them in there as long as you can. There are plenty of other milestones to celebrate, and although it’s exciting to see them grow, you’ll soon realize that they and you are not ready for this change. Please, do yourself a favor and get some sleep for those of us who are desperately missing it.
Promise me. You must promise!
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Summary:
Keeping your child in a crib as long as possible can provide a sense of security for both parents and children. Transitioning to a big kid bed can lead to sleepless nights and unexpected challenges, making it essential to consider the implications before making the switch.