When it comes to intimacy during pregnancy, it’s a topic often left unspoken. Personally, I found it somewhat strange to discuss my sexual experiences while nurturing new life within me. The entire journey of pregnancy was a whirlwind, filled with hormonal changes, body transformations, discomfort, excitement, and anxieties—how could I possibly focus on intimacy? Yet, especially during my first pregnancy, my perception of femininity and my relationship with my partner evolved rapidly. I wouldn’t say I craved sex constantly, but I also didn’t shy away when my partner showed interest. In fact, there were moments when I found intimacy more pleasurable than ever. My libido fluctuated dramatically throughout my pregnancy, but there were distinct patterns linked to each trimester (and, let’s be real, my digestive health).
1. The ‘We’re Expecting! We’re So Attractive!’ Phase
After a long journey to conceive, my partner and I were overjoyed when we finally received the good news. The atmosphere between us became overwhelmingly affectionate, and I saw my partner in an entirely new light. We could enjoy intimacy without the stress of trying to conceive, and for the first couple of weeks, our experiences were nothing short of exhilarating.
2. The ‘Please Don’t Touch Me’ Phase
Not long after I received my initial positive pregnancy test, I braced myself for the onset of nausea. Initially, I felt fantastic—my body seemed to be thriving! But soon, the nausea hit, and I found myself repelled by my partner’s scent, which I perceived as an unpleasant mix of sweat and something rotten. For most of the first trimester, intimacy was simply out of the question.
3. The ‘Why Is My Libido So High?’ Phase
Once the first trimester passed, my sex drive surged unexpectedly. It felt almost taboo to desire intimacy while carrying a child, yet I learned from conversations with other parents (and some research) that this heightened libido is quite common. Hormonal shifts and increased blood flow certainly played a role, not to mention the changes to my body.
4. The ‘What If We Harm the Baby?’ Phase
As the pregnancy progressed, the reality of having a baby became undeniable. I could feel the baby moving, and my partner could too. We found ourselves concerned about the implications of intimacy, fearing we might inadvertently harm the little one. There were moments when we both felt anxious about engaging in sexual activity.
5. The ‘Desperate to Induce Labor’ Phase
Eventually, I moved past the fear of causing harm to the baby during intimacy, although nothing quite matched the thrill of the second trimester. As my pregnancy advanced, I felt increasingly uncomfortable. Lying down led to heartburn, and standing felt like too much pressure. But in those last weeks, my mindset shifted—I just wanted the baby to arrive. I was willing to try anything to facilitate labor, including the age-old notion that intimacy could help. I experimented with various methods, including the use of an artificial insemination kit. While I enjoyed it to some extent, I may not have been as enthusiastic as my partner. Shortly thereafter, we welcomed our little one into the world.
Of course, becoming parents didn’t mean our intimate lives instantly returned to normal—far from it. Anyone expecting that is likely to be disappointed. In retrospect, I wish I had engaged in intimacy more during my pregnancy, given the challenges of the postpartum period. However, as with everything in the chaotic first year of parenting, our sex life adapted, and now my partner and I enjoy a fulfilling intimate relationship, albeit one that fits within the busy lives we lead as parents.
Reflecting on my experiences during pregnancy, I mostly smile. There were awkward moments and times of discomfort, but many aspects were genuinely enjoyable—with a delightful dose of absurdity, just as intimacy should be.
For further insights into fertility and pregnancy, IVF Babble is an excellent resource, and check out this informative chat with Dr. Smith on infertility insights.
Summary:
Navigating intimacy during pregnancy involves a range of emotions and physical changes. From the excitement of conception to the challenges of discomfort and fears about the baby, each phase presents its own unique dynamics. Many couples experience shifts in libido and feelings of closeness, while also facing anxieties as the pregnancy progresses. Ultimately, the journey is one of adaptation and connection, with the potential for a thriving intimate relationship even after the arrival of a new child.