Updated: August 3, 2016
Originally Published: June 21, 2016
Despite our advancements, humanity still struggles to coexist peacefully. People inflict pain on one another for reasons that often elude us, and this harsh reality is something we must confront with our children. As terrifying as this truth is for any parent, it becomes particularly daunting for those raising sensitive children, like my son, who grapples with anxiety.
He is deeply empathetic, often moved to tears by the stories he watches, revealing a heart that is both beautiful and vulnerable. This quality enables him to connect with others, but it also makes him more exposed to the world’s harsh realities. As a mother, my instinct is to shield him from such pain.
When news of the tragic events in Orlando emerged, my immediate thought was to protect his innocence at just 8 years old. I dreaded the prospect of dealing with his tears and sleepless nights filled with anxiety. Parenting through these challenging times is exhausting, and I questioned my ability to confront it.
However, an older child nearby shared grim details about the incident, prompting my son to seek answers from me, his trusted source. I contemplated downplaying the situation, dismissing it as unimportant, and reassuring him that he need not worry. But the truth is, it was a significant event, and he absolutely should be concerned. We all should be, especially our children.
They are the ones who will inherit a world where love can lead to danger and violence against others occurs without respect for human life. They will witness such atrocities repeatedly while we, as adults, lament but resist taking action for change. I want my son to be equipped to navigate this future. I want him to understand that his mother advocates for equality, acceptance, love, and kindness, and that standing up for these values is essential.
I want him to grasp the importance of bravery and pride. I want him to feel empowered amid chaos and to recognize that such violence is unacceptable. It was crucial that we discussed this, so we sat down and talked about it as thoroughly as we could.
I explained that the pain inflicted upon others also affects us. This struggle is not theirs alone; it belongs to all of us. If some cannot live freely, then neither can we. We can do better—each of us has a role to play.
Here’s how we can guide our children in understanding the tragedy in Orlando and how they can contribute positively:
- Educate Yourself
Staying informed about the tragedy is essential, but this conversation extends beyond just facts. It requires personal growth to become a better advocate for your children. Take time to understand the struggles faced by the LGBTQ community, learning the appropriate language and context. It’s vital to educate ourselves continuously, ensuring our children understand the meanings behind terms like “queer” and “transgender,” and why these identities should not be feared or misunderstood. - Engage in Meaningful Conversations
Discuss not only the tragedy but also broader issues like the value of human life, the need for safety and acceptance, and the distinction between acceptance and mere tolerance. Children should know they can rely on you for honesty, even if it means navigating complex topics. While some might shy away from discussing homosexuality, focus on the core values of love, equality, compassion, and empathy—these are essential lessons for all. - Avoid Irrelevant Discussions
Resist the urge to use this moment to criticize others’ lifestyles. Instead, utilize it as a teaching moment that emphasizes understanding and support. - Encourage Giving
My son understands that charitable contributions can make a difference. He decided to donate $28—his entire leftover birthday money—to organizations assisting those affected in Orlando. I matched his donation, reinforcing the idea that even small contributions can have a significant impact. If you’re inspired to give as well, consider contributing to reputable charities. - Promote Love, Not Hate
To further express our support, my son and I brainstormed ways kids could showcase their love. He created heartfelt drawings and messages to share with others, aiming to remind those hurting that they are not alone. Encouraging your kids to create artwork or messages of support is a fantastic way to spread positivity. Use hashtags like #ChooseLoveProject to amplify this message of love and understanding.
Ultimately, my son desires a world filled with love, not hate, for everyone.
Summary
In a world still grappling with violence and intolerance, it is essential for parents to prepare their children to embrace love and empathy. By educating ourselves, engaging in open discussions about acceptance, and encouraging acts of kindness, we can empower our children to face an often harsh reality with hope and resilience.