A while back, my partner received a Facebook message from a stranger. After a bit of digging, we learned that he was part of a large community we both belonged to, but we had never interacted. The message read: “Hey there! I wanted to reach out and see if you might need some guidance on discussing health goals with your wife. I’m a nutrition and fitness coach, and I’d love to help you approach the topic so she can start moving and eating in a way that benefits both of you.”
This “coach” turned out to be a representative for a multi-level marketing (MLM) company, peddling an expensive weight-loss program. Looking back, I wish we had responded more forcefully, but at the time, I was just beginning to embrace body positivity and moving away from self-loathing. I was still building the confidence to stand up for myself in the face of unsolicited advice.
We chose not to reply, and I asked my partner to delete the message. The next time I spotted this guy at church, I made sure to avoid him. His message was infuriating, especially since I always put effort into my appearance for church—stylish outfits, immaculate hair, and makeup that could turn heads. This individual assumed, without knowing me, that my husband was dissatisfied with my appearance and needed help bringing up weight loss.
Let me clarify: If my husband had concerns about my health, he would talk to me about it directly, and he finds me beautiful just as I am. This kind of unsolicited advice is the same treatment that people in larger bodies experience daily. It’s a constant barrage of messages suggesting that we need to change ourselves, as if living in a larger body is something to be ashamed of.
And new moms are particularly vulnerable to this kind of predatory marketing. Just as they are adjusting to life with a newborn and figuring out how to care for themselves, individuals from MLM companies target them, offering “help” to lose weight or “bounce back” after pregnancy. This is nothing short of cruel.
If you think this isn’t a significant issue, take a look at this Instagram post that highlights numerous examples of such predatory behavior. It includes stories of moms recovering from surgery, ex-coaches revealing the tactics used, and weight-loss challenges that invite complete strangers to join based solely on their appearance. These practices are abusive and exploitative, making it incredibly hard for women to just exist in their bodies.
Recently, an acquaintance sent me an unsolicited message for the twelfth time in two years. He has made a habit of reaching out during major life changes, particularly when he sees an opportunity to promote a “weight loss special.” Given that I’m nearing the end of my pregnancy, he decided this was the perfect time to offer his “help” for my impending weight-loss journey.
But here’s the thing: I have been vocal about my rejection of diet culture for years. I am embracing my body and focusing on mental well-being rather than obsessing over size. I am not thin, but I feel strong and healthy, and I’m approaching my healthcare provider with confidence.
Am I eager to shed the weight of this baby once it’s born? Absolutely. But I don’t need a wellness coach to do that; I’ll rely on my OB for guidance.
After many polite refusals, I finally told him I have a healthy relationship with my body and will not be engaging with him. I also made the decision to cut him out of my social media. Having mutual friends isn’t enough to justify being consistently disrespected.
This isn’t an anti-MLM piece; I’ve bought products from friends in the past. But when some individuals choose to use their business to demean and target vulnerable new moms, that’s where I draw the line. If someone wants your product, they’ll know how to find you. So how about you just… don’t?
If you’re interested in more discussions on topics like these, check out this blog post for additional insights on new motherhood. Also, for those looking for expert advice on pregnancy and home insemination, you can visit CCRM IVF’s blog for valuable resources.
Summary
Targeting postpartum moms with weight loss products is a form of cyber-bullying that exploits their vulnerability. This predatory marketing tactic preys on new mothers during a time when they are adjusting to significant life changes. As they navigate the challenges of motherhood, unsolicited messages from wellness coaches can be harmful and undermine their self-worth. It’s essential to recognize this issue and advocate for the respect and dignity of all individuals, regardless of their body size.