Stop Expecting Women to Smile

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A reality TV personality recently faced significant backlash after expressing her frustration with the common expectation for women to smile. The phrase “You should smile!” often echoes in the ears of women, especially when they venture out in public without a visible grin. Why is this demand so pervasive among men? This question arose during a particularly annoying incident that one woman shared, sparking a wave of reactions.

Lara Thompson, known for her appearance on a popular TLC series, My Big Life, experienced this firsthand when she stopped at a convenience store to grab some items. Upon approaching the counter, the cashier insisted she smile if she wanted to complete her purchase. “I just needed some Tylenol and gum,” she recounted. “When I got to the register, he said, ‘Hey there, sweetheart,’ and added, ‘You gotta give me a smile if you want this,’ while hiding my gum from me.” Lara dismissed his demand, stating, “I’ll just take the gum.” Instead of processing her purchase, the clerk muttered criticisms about her attitude.

With a loyal following of over 350,000 fans on social media, Lara turned to her platform to voice her annoyance over the expectation placed on women to perform for strangers. The backlash she received was astonishing, with many people trivializing her experience. “It’s just a smile; get over it,” was a common refrain.

Lara emphasized in her post, “Interactions like this are incredibly frustrating and demeaning. I wasn’t rude to him, and I don’t owe anyone a smile just because they demand it. I had a headache and was tired, but my reasons for not smiling don’t need to be justified.” Why should she be required to do anything beyond paying for her purchase? Such expectations highlight a persistent issue where women are told to be more accommodating and cheerful for the comfort of others. If she had been a weary man, no one would have expected him to smile on command.

The negative feedback she received, particularly from other women, was disheartening. Comments ranged from suggestions that she should have just smiled to assertions that the clerk was merely trying to brighten her day. “Maybe he just wanted to cheer you up,” some said. Yet, how is it considered rude to refuse to smile when one is not in the mood to do so? Lara concluded her post with a poignant question: “Would he have withheld items from a male customer until he smiled? I’d wager the answer is no.”

In summary, Lara’s experience underscores the societal pressure on women to maintain a cheerful facade, even in moments of discomfort. The expectation that women must smile to appease others reflects a broader issue of gender dynamics and power plays in everyday interactions. It’s essential to recognize that a woman’s worth isn’t tied to her willingness to perform happiness for others.

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