Mother’s Day is often painted as a picture of joy, filled with flowers and breakfast in bed. However, for Hidden Moms, it can serve as a poignant reminder of their losses. These are women who have said goodbye to a child, yet still embody the essence of motherhood.
A Hidden Mom has held her baby within her, cradled it gently, whispered sweet lullabies, and shared stories with her growing belly. The love she feels is profound, a radiant flame that continues to shine brightly despite the shadow of loss. This bond remains, even when faced with heart-wrenching realities—cramps, bleeding, and the crushing awareness that something is amiss. Despite medical facts and the compassion of healthcare professionals, the love of a Hidden Mom endures. It cannot be dimmed or overlooked.
When my daughter, Mia, was born, the room was eerily silent. She came into the world without a cry, her eyes never opening. Her existence was measured in weeks, not in joyful birthday celebrations. That moment transformed my understanding of the world. After that day, marked only by my tears falling onto the hospital floor—a ground my daughter would never tread—I became part of a sisterhood of Hidden Moms. Together, we share our stories, and in those exchanges, an instant connection forms. It’s a bond that runs as deep as the ocean, one that only those who have loved and lost can truly comprehend.
Each mother’s experience of grief is distinct, as is her path to healing. For me, the blessing of my living children means I cherish every moment with them more deeply. I hold them closer, pray for their safety with fervor, and save every drawing they create. This is because I understand the ache of Hidden Motherhood. To outsiders, I may seem like a mother of three, but my heart holds space for another child whose love still burns brightly within me.
Mother’s Day can be overwhelming for Hidden Moms, stirring feelings of longing that may never fade. It prompts a moment of reflection on the profound nature of motherhood, emphasizing both the visible and invisible aspects of this role. From stretch marks to cherished memories, the tangible tokens of motherhood are plentiful. Yet, for Hidden Moms, the absence of their child serves as a painful reminder.
To all the Hidden Moms, this day is still yours. It’s an opportunity to step out of silence and acknowledge the love you hold for your children. While commercial sentiments may overlook your pain, remember that your experience as a mother is valid. Is your love present? Absolutely! Does it keep memories alive? Yes! Is it the light that guides you through grief? Without a doubt! Those truths outweigh everything else.
I honor you and your children who have passed. We are interconnected on this journey of grief and healing, navigating this “new normal” together. Today is a day for us to embrace our identities as mothers.
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Summary
Mother’s Day can be challenging for Hidden Moms, who carry the love and memory of children they have lost. This day serves as a reminder of their unique experiences and the deep love they hold. It’s essential to acknowledge their pain while celebrating the love that remains. Hidden Moms are not alone; their stories connect them in profound ways, and today is a day for them to step forward and celebrate their motherhood.