As I sit here, my thoughts are heavy with the sorrow of families who are in mourning. I can’t even begin to imagine what it’s like for someone like Jordan Smith, who is facing the unimaginable heartache of losing both a partner and their beloved child in a single moment. The thought of planning a memorial for two loved ones at once is beyond comprehension. Furthermore, being in the spotlight where so many feel their grief is intertwined with hers must add a layer of complexity that’s hard to fathom.
I may not understand Jordan’s specific pain, but I do know the weight of deep grief. My daughter passed away unexpectedly on a Sunday as well. That day shattered my world, and even three years later, I can’t help but remember that morning—my own introduction to what it means to truly experience a “bad day.”
In the beginning, social media was flooded with messages about my loss, and it felt as though my phone would never stop buzzing. But as time passed, something shifted. The world began to move on, while I remained frozen in my sorrow.
Even now, as we reflect on the losses endured by the Smith family, the Altobelli family, the Mauser family, the Chester family, and the Zobayan family, I find myself thinking of them with increased intensity. Perhaps it’s because I’ve walked a similar path. As the media coverage dwindles and tributes become less frequent, the reality is that these families are still grappling with their immense grief.
Tragedy is an unfortunate part of life that we can’t prevent, no matter how much we wish we could. In the wake of loss, we often hear that others “can’t imagine” the depth of grief that those affected are experiencing. This phrase has become a common response, one meant to express sympathy but often comes off as dismissive. It’s not that we’re incapable of understanding another’s pain; it’s that we shy away from truly confronting it.
The isolation that accompanies grief is compounded when those who are grieving feel that their experiences are inconceivable to others. For those left behind, the harsh reality of their new existence is anything but unimaginable—it’s a daily struggle they face.
The truth is, grief is a lifelong journey. If we want to truly support those in mourning, we must acknowledge that our empathy is needed long after the funeral.
We may not know what it’s like to be a family member of someone who died on that fateful day, but we can certainly try to envision their pain. We can imagine the countless sleepless nights and the challenging “firsts” that will be painfully evident in the coming year.
While there’s much we cannot do, one thing we can offer is our capacity to imagine their grief. For more insights on the complexities of loss, you can check out this post. And for those looking for more information on pregnancy and related topics, the WHO provides excellent resources.
To summarize, it’s vital that we cultivate empathy for those who are grieving, recognizing that their pain is real and enduring. Let’s strive to support them beyond the initial waves of sympathy.