After spending nearly ten years managing my household and raising my kids, I’m finally ready to step back into the professional world. It took a lot of encouragement to get here—after all, who would want to hire someone who sometimes goes days without showering and casually uses “sugardoodle” as a substitute for stronger language? Yet, here I am, trading in my comfy yoga pants for a professional outfit and wondering if women still wear pantyhose to the office.
Before I headed out on my first day, my husband reminded me to try not to “mom it up” in the workplace. As I prepared myself, I made a mental checklist of things to avoid doing to ensure I don’t embarrass myself:
- Don’t threaten coworkers with a timeout.
It might be tempting to use that classic mom technique of giving a child a timeout, but I can only imagine how human resources would react if I tried that with a colleague. While I’ve mastered the “angry mom” look, I need to keep it in check. - Avoid excessive praise.
When my boss shares news, my instinct is to respond with enthusiastic comments like, “Wow, that’s amazing! Great job!” However, this level of enthusiasm might come off as sarcastic in a professional setting. I need to remember that adults don’t need the same kind of validation I give my kids. - Don’t wipe anyone’s mouth during lunch.
Even if my coworker, Mark, can’t seem to keep his food off his beard, I should resist the urge to clean him up with a napkin. That’s crossing a line! - Refrain from speaking in the third person.
I can picture it now: a colleague criticizing me for forgetting to refill the ink in the communal printer, and me responding like a child with, “Mia doesn’t appreciate that!” I definitely need to avoid that kind of behavior. - Leave the sticker chart at home.
While it was effective for my kids, offering stickers to motivate my coworkers is not going to land well. Instead, I hope that free bagels in the break room will do the trick. - No bribery allowed.
Even in stressful situations, I must resist the urge to resort to bribery, because that could lead to serious consequences. I doubt adults would be excited about a handful of jellybeans!
Though I’m excited about the prospect of engaging with other adults after years of parenting, there’s a part of me that feels anxious about leaving my children in someone else’s care. The big day has finally arrived. I’ve packed a lunch that doesn’t include yogurt tubes or juice boxes and donned a polished outfit. Now, I just need to remember not to say things like, “Thanks for using your manners!”
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Summary:
Rejoining the workforce after being a stay-at-home mom can be daunting. It’s important to adapt to a professional environment by avoiding familiar parenting habits like offering praise excessively, cleaning up after coworkers, or using childlike language. As you prepare for your new role, focus on maintaining professionalism while navigating the transition.