As a pregnant woman eager for knowledge, I immersed myself in research. I read every book on childbirth, watched countless documentaries, and prepared meticulously for the adventure ahead. My plans included a natural delivery, immediate skin-to-skin contact, and breastfeeding. However, one thing I didn’t anticipate was the challenges of breastfeeding.
My mother had three straightforward natural births and a combined 11 years of stress-free breastfeeding. No issues, no electric pumps—just happy, healthy babies. That was the world I had known. So, it was a shock when my son stubbornly refused to latch for nearly four hours after birth. While my midwife reassured me that his throat was irritated due to meconium suctioning, I hoped he would feed soon.
But he didn’t.
He would latch briefly, only to pull away in frustration. I was overwhelmed, exhausted, and unsure of how to proceed. Luckily, my son maintained his blood sugar levels and didn’t lose too much weight, so the hospital discharged us without extensive guidance. What followed were two weeks filled with sleepless nights, anxiety, and confusion.
Despite my efforts to nurse every two hours, my chunky baby lost nearly two pounds. My husband and I were at a loss. After consulting three lactation specialists, we discovered that while my baby was trying hard to latch, he simply couldn’t transfer milk due to an anatomical issue. I was heartbroken and utterly drained.
To avoid nipple confusion, we embarked on a chaotic journey of pumping, using a tube to feed him alongside my nipple (a two-person job that required at least four hands), and supplementing with formula—all of this done every two hours. Breastfeeding was my goal, and it felt nearly unattainable.
In a moment of desperation, I offered him a bottle of freshly pumped milk. To my relief, he eagerly accepted it and fell asleep content. He began to regain weight, and I realized I had another option: exclusively pumping. Surprisingly, this new approach was much more manageable than our previous routine.
I pumped six times a day, including one late-night session, during which I finally got some reading done. I mastered the art of sanitizing bottles in minimal time, discovered the convenience of hands-free pumping bras, and even learned to multitask—pumping while eating breakfast and sipping coffee became my new norm. Though it was challenging, it was also incredibly rewarding.
Gradually, my milk supply increased, reaching 45 ounces a day. My son thrived, hitting the 99th percentile for height and weight. By 12 weeks postpartum, I could drop my night pump and enjoy uninterrupted sleep. My husband and I started going on date nights, and he generously took on night duties, allowing me to sleep in on weekends. The pumping routine I established made returning to work significantly easier, transforming what once felt impossible into a manageable reality.
I set small goals: three months, six months, nine months, then a year. Now, after nearly 16 months, I’m in the process of weaning, and I’m amazed at how far I’ve come. My son is happy and healthy, with just one 24-hour fever in his entire life. He’s as chubby and cheerful as ever. My husband has also built a strong bond with our child, participating in bedtime routines five nights a week and spending quality weekend mornings together.
These past 16 months have been a roller coaster, filled with both challenges and joyous moments. I’ve learned that breastfeeding doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing endeavor. Every drop of milk is a gift to my child, whether we had breastfed for five days or 25 months. Pumping is a valid form of breastfeeding, and mothers who exclusively pump are incredibly resilient.
To those mothers who are pumping: I see you. I recognize the struggles of late-night pump sessions, the endless washing of bottles, and the discomfort of sore nipples. I understand the temptation to toss your pump out the window in frustration, yet you persist through each session.
Take it one day at a time. You’ve got this. Whether you pump for a week or two years, your dedication to providing the best for your baby is commendable. Every effort counts, and you are doing an amazing job.
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Summary:
My journey through 16 months of exclusive pumping was filled with unexpected challenges and triumphs. From the initial struggles with breastfeeding to discovering the benefits of pumping, I learned the importance of adaptability and resilience. Each day was a new opportunity to provide nourishment for my child, proving that every effort counts, no matter the method.