During my son’s first week of kindergarten, he attempted to escape. He resisted teachers who tried to guide him indoors, ignored their requests, and unleashed tantrums that were beyond comprehension. Naturally, the school contacted us and arranged meetings. Concerned and confused by the description of our child, we attended.
Prior to kindergarten, we had noticed some unusual behaviors. At age two, he could spend hours fixated on the wheels of his Matchbox cars, becoming upset if we suggested any other activity. He needed help with delayed speech and fine motor skills, but until he started school, we hadn’t observed any significant behavioral challenges. He had made friends easily in preschool, enjoyed his teachers, and appeared to be just like any other child his age.
However, we took the concerns of his kindergarten teacher and school administrators seriously. It was evident that something wasn’t quite right. Two months later, after numerous meetings, assessments, and questionnaires, our son was diagnosed with ADHD.
Fast forward to third grade, and many of the same challenges continue: he struggles to complete his schoolwork, often tunes out, isolates himself from peers, disregards directions, and loses himself in his thoughts. This is not for lack of effort on anyone’s part. We’ve exhausted every avenue available. I have meticulously documented our attempts. Here’s a glimpse into what we’ve done:
Strategies We’ve Implemented:
- Love and support
- Consistency and routine
- Structured environment
- No screen time
- Limited screen time
- Screen time as a reward for good behavior
- Weekly and daily rewards for positive behavior
- Eliminating sugar
- Allowing sugar
- Restricting gluten
- Allowing gluten
- No dairy
- Allowing dairy
- Strict discipline
- Yelling and shouting
- Timeouts
- Counting to three, then two… one!
- Adjusting rules to a more lenient approach
- Relaxing rules to a more stringent approach
- Physical comfort, like back rubs
- Talk therapy
- Behavioral therapy
- Physical therapy
- Primal Reflex Release Technique therapy
- Eye exams
- Hearing assessments
- Autism spectrum disorder evaluations
- Using guilt to motivate behavior during after-school programs
- Creating an Individualized Education Program (IEP) at school
- Advocating for IEP implementation in various classes
- Ensuring all staff are aware of the IEP requirements
- Arranging for in-class support at school
- Seeing a social worker at school
- Letting him choose his summer camp activities
- Offering rewards if he participates in his chosen summer camp classes
- Reading books like “Raising Your Spirited Child”
- Revisiting the same resources repeatedly
- Showering him with unconditional love and reassurance each day
What We Haven’t Tried Yet:
- Medication
What We Plan to Try Soon:
- Continuing our love and support
- Exploring medication options
If medication proves ineffective, it will simply join the long list of strategies we’ve attempted. Perhaps this list will only continue to grow. For now, we are prepared to try medication and hold onto hope.
Regardless of what lies ahead, we are ready to face it, even though it often feels like we’re anything but ready. That, my friends, is the essence of parenthood: a constant game of guessing what comes next, navigating uncertainties, and charging forward.
Now, who’s in this with me? Together, let’s take a leap of faith!
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Summary:
Navigating the challenges of parenting a child with ADHD is a difficult journey filled with trials and various strategies. From implementing strict routines to seeking professional help, parents often find themselves exploring countless avenues in the hopes of finding solutions. As they prepare to try medication, they remain committed to providing love and support, regardless of the outcomes.