Remote learning is undeniably draining. Between juggling Zoom calls, countless apps, and guiding kids through each frustrating step just to submit their assignments, the entire experience can feel overwhelming. When you factor in an IEP or 504 plan, it can push any parent to their limits. As much as I wish I could say I’ve mastered this process, managing my kids’ IEPs during virtual schooling has proven to be incredibly challenging for numerous reasons.
For those unfamiliar with the term, an IEP, or Individualized Educational Program, is a legal document designed for public school children who require special education services, in accordance with the Individuals With Disabilities Education Act (IDEA). An IEP outlines a child’s current performance levels, strengths, and needs, sets measurable annual goals, identifies necessary services and accommodations, and specifies who is responsible for executing each component of the IEP.
Navigating this process for two of my children has been anything but straightforward. Each child needs an educational evaluation to determine if they qualify for one of the 13 disability categories under IDEA. In my case, one child qualifies due to a speech and language impairment, while the other qualifies for a visual impairment combined with ADHD. I must admit that each experience has been long, confusing, and emotionally taxing.
As a parent, it’s my responsibility to ensure that everyone involved in my children’s education is aware of their IEPs and that the goals align with their needs. This task is daunting during normal times, and the added pressure of a global pandemic makes it even more overwhelming. Additionally, my other two kids have 504 plans—a less intensive alternative to IEPs—making it a struggle to keep up with all the tutoring, reading support, speech therapy, occupational therapy, and counseling sessions. With around 15 extra Zoom sessions each week, just remembering the schedules and login information sends my anxiety soaring.
I often find myself torn between gratitude for the services my kids receive and frustration over the chaos it brings. I can’t seem to strike the right balance between staying in close contact with teachers and administrators and not wanting to be a nuisance. Honestly, I wouldn’t be shocked if any of them thought I was an overly anxious parent.
I also empathize with my kids. Transitioning to remote schooling and losing their daily routines has been tough for them as well. They feel like they must succeed with one hand tied behind their backs. They’ve expressed their frustrations about the extra sessions, and I can’t blame them—I’m feeling the same way.
Currently, I’m attempting to manage a one-room schoolhouse for four kids, each with unique needs that I sometimes feel ill-equipped to address. I often feel inadequate and guilty for not being able to fulfill all their requirements during this challenging time. The lack of downtime to recharge and the ongoing stress of this pandemic weigh heavily on me.
The most daunting aspect is the fear of my children losing the progress they’ve made. I’m concerned they may fall behind their peers once in-person schooling resumes, and I worry that returning to school could lead to setbacks. The helplessness I feel is disheartening.
I acknowledge that I approach this situation from a place of privilege. My children are relatively high-functioning, and I have a background in child development and education. I don’t struggle with food insecurity or job loss, and I have a supportive partner who helps share the load.
I can’t claim to understand the challenges faced by parents of children with severe emotional, physical, or cognitive difficulties. For some, virtual learning isn’t even feasible, and they may have to take on full-time caregiving roles with minimal support. I recognize that I don’t fully grasp what it means to navigate IEPs while also worrying about job security or basic needs.
This isn’t a plea for sympathy or an invitation for pity; rather, I’m sharing my experience with managing IEPs during remote learning so that other parents of children with special needs know they’re not alone. The feelings of frustration and overwhelm are universal among us.
We shouldn’t point fingers at anyone—parents, children, teachers, and service providers are all striving to do their best in what often feels like an impossible situation. For further insights and support, check out this resource on fertility preservation and parenting.
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In summary, while managing IEPs during remote learning can feel overwhelming, it’s important to remember that many parents share similar struggles. By fostering a sense of community and understanding, we can navigate these challenges together for the benefit of our children.