November brings with it a delightful mix of pumpkin pie indulgence, early morning Black Friday shopping sprees, and cozy sweater weather. It’s a month filled with festivities, also marked as National Adoption Month—a time to celebrate children finding loving homes while expressing gratitude. This duality is particularly meaningful to me, as two of my children are adopted, and adoption has always been a natural concept in my family, with several relatives also having been adopted.
As an adoptive parent, I often find myself fielding a variety of intrusive and sometimes baffling questions about adoption. While I typically try to respond politely and change the subject—“Oh, look at the time, my cat needs grooming!”—I sometimes daydream about how I’d love to answer these queries instead.
- Can’t you have any children of your own? Well, that’s a no-go for me; my reproductive system has seen better days. After battling endometriosis, I had to part ways with some key components. Want to discuss my medical history further?
- What happened to their real mom? Honestly, I’m unsure! These adorable children had me up at 5 a.m. demanding pancakes and cartoons, which seems quite “real” to me. Is there someone else supposed to handle these early morning requests? Oh, and by the way, are those your real eyebrows?
- How much did they cost? They were free! But let’s talk about those outrageous prices you pay for your fancy sneakers.
- Do you know Angelina Jolie? Absolutely! Just yesterday, I texted her saying, “Let’s grab some takeout in our yoga pants.” Sure, I know celebrities who adopt; we all hang out sipping boxed wine and enjoying football.
- Why did you adopt from China instead of your own country? I adopted from my own species, so that counts for something, right? When’s a good time to discuss your imported car and those shoes made overseas?
- Now that you’ve adopted, do you think you’ll get pregnant? Oh, we’re still talking about my reproductive system? Just refer back to my first answer.
- Are you planning to tell them they’re adopted? It will depend on their intellect. Given that two Caucasians typically don’t produce Asian children, we’ll probably have that chat around their teenage years, when they’ll need to work through that angst.
- You’re a saint for giving those poor children a good home. You bet I am! But right now, the kids are calling for me. Time to take care of them (and maybe enjoy a drink).
If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination, check out this article. For those curious about fertility journeys, Dr. Emily Carson shares her experience here, and you can explore additional resources on pregnancy here.
In summary, while navigating adoption inquiries can be challenging, it’s essential to maintain humor and perspective, all while encouraging a deeper understanding of the beautiful complexities of adoption.